My Life, My Secrets, My Story (THE LIFEST SERIES BOOK 1)

My Life, My Secrets, My Story Part 50

"Alex!" Josh whined.

"What the heck are you guys doing?!" I questioned, not getting anything

"Alec, keep up! She means that if the alpha takes her and everyone else is ok, then she doesn't mind!" Josh yelled.

"WHAT?!" everyone yelled, including me.

"Yah! Cant you tell?!" Josh yelled back.

"Alex are you nuts?! You can't do that!!" -Bells, who was close to crying

"You're the most important!! Hello! Lifest!!!" -Olive, who was also close to crying but hid it a little better, and was still reasoning

"Crazy, idiot! No way we're letting you do that!!!" -Josh, who slammed the table hard enough to dent it

"If you think we'll let you your dead wrong!! No way am I loosing you again!!" -Andrew, who also slammed the table, making another dent.

"No way! Not happening!" -Oscar

"Nu Uh! We are not letting that happen!!!" -Brendan

"Alex, that is preposterous!!! What kind of crazy thinking is that?!" -Jack

The last three, Brendan, Oscar, and Jack, were the calmest. They didn't love her as much or know her much, personally. I was thinking about when we were in the meadow and she was telling me about how she wanted to die. Alex must've still been in my head cause she flinched, at my thoughts.

"Alex, do you still want to?" I asked, knowing she knew what I was talking about.

"I don't know. It seems like the best option right now, I mean I can't take it anymore Alec. This kind of thing always happens to me, and I figure if I'm taken out of the equation everything I'll be ok." she said, looking down.

I let go of her. Everyone was confused, they were just standing there watching, not really understanding.

"Why?! Why the heck would you think like that?! You think if your not there than everyone I'll be ok?! Everything won't be, think about me, Bells, Olive, Josh, and everyone else that'll be hurt!! (Andrew and Suzy), you just got them back!!! You want to lose them again?! They'll be hurt! You wouldn't do that to Suzy, would you?!" I yelled at her.

She looked shocked at my outburst. She didn't think of that, I guess.

"I am thinking of everybody! You'll all be sad at first but I'm nothing important!! You don't need me!! The world can survive with just you, no one needs me!! You'll get over me just like any other person!! In the end, I'm always thinking of you guys!!! I'm a trouble magnet!! I cause havoc and mayhem to everyone around me!! I want to keep you guys safe!!! The only way to do that is to get me out of the equation!!" she yelled back.

Why? Why is she thinking like this? What caused her to think like this? She doesn't need to think like this!!! I grabbed her shoulders and shook her, violently.

"Your so stupid! Idiot! We're doing all this to protect you!! You think we'd do all this just so we can watch you die?! Are you crazy?! No one would be ok!! We'd all be crushed!! I'd kill myself without you, Alex!!! I can't live without you!! I can't!! I'm giving my all to keep you next to me and you want to leave me?! Why?! WHY?!?!?!" I screamed at her, while shaking her.

The tears started to flow, and I regretted yelling at her. My anger got the best of me, I guess.

"Alec! I can't take it anymore!!! I've had too much to deal with!! What I told you in the meadow wasn't all of it!!! I've had more to deal with!!! No one knows what I've been through!! I did nothing wrong!!! Yet I'm the one with the most troubles!!! I don't wanna live more!! There's nothing to live for!!" she yelled, the tears flowing freely.