Weightless| Vkook 💜

True Love| 40

There both males sat, quietly getting on with their work whilst the chatter if the class buzzed around them.

Occasionally Taehyung would look across at Namjoon but he thought better than to disturb him.

Namjoon wants to speak to Taehyung, however, he doesn't know where to begin. The younger male is so confusing and yet so simple.

"Do you have any siblings?" Namjoon asks out if the blue whilst still writing on his paper.

The question catches Taehyung off guard but he's quick to recover and respond. He doesn't feel nervous around Namjoon which is nice.

"Yes. One older brother and sister. What about you?"

"Nope I'm an only child"

They go back into a synchronised silence.

"Do you...uhhh...have a favourite colour?" Taehyung asks awkwardly.

Although it's a pretty boring, basic question, Namjoon really appreciates the effort of Taehyung actually asking him a question. He thought it would just be a one sided question.

"Pink probably" Namjoon responds. "I actually want to dye my hair that colour"

"Really?" Taehyung asks, his eyes lighting up.

"Yeah. What do you think about it?"

"It would look so cool hyung......sorry I mean Namjoon" Taehyung corrects himself.

He's scared about being hit. It was going all so well. Too well. And he had to go and mess it up by being informal.

"That's alright Taehyung, you can call me hyung. And I'll get it done then if you think it will look good"

Taehyung's eyes sparkle in admiration.

"Yes hyung it will look amazing on you"

"Do you want to dye your hair any colour?" Namjoon asks.

Taehyung frowns and pulls down his long curly blonde hair. He looks at it a while before ruffling it and smiling at Namjoon.

"Maybe red. I really like the colour red"

"Yes. You should deffo do that. It would really suit your blue eyes. Be a nice contrast"

"You think?"

"Yea course"

"Thank you hyung"

"I have hair dye kits at home. Some day after school you should come round mine and we can dye our hair"

Taehyung grins.

"Totally. I mean if that's ok with you, I don't want to waste your money on dying my hair"

"It wouldn't be a waste. I'm excited for it" Namjoon says sincerely.

Both males grin at eachother.

"H-hyung"

"What's up Taehyung?" Namjoon asks in concern.

"Can....can I ask you a weird question?" Taehyung asks nervously.

Namjoon would joke with Taehyung and say that he already had but he feels as though now's not the time.

"Of course Taehyungie. Oh can I call you that?"

"Yeah that's fine hyung"

"So what's going on Taehyungie?"

"Do you...do you believe in true love?"

"Are you trying to confess your undying love for me Taehyungie? I'm touched" Namjoon teases, holding his hand on his heart.

Taehyung rolls his eyes playfully.

"I'm straight" Taehyung sort of lies. He's bi.

"Taehyungie you can be anything you wanna be and I'll always support you, but one thing you're not is straight. My gay dar tells me everything". Namjoon jokes.

Taehyung laughs along with him. The cute little giggle that erupts from the back of his throat melts Namjoon's heart.

"But honestly Taehyung" Namjoon says in all seriousness, "I do believe in true love. Don't you?"

"I don't know hyung"

'everyone I care about leaves or hurts me. If true love exists then there's no way I'm going to get it' Taehyung thinks to himself. 'it'll just be another thing that slips through the gaps in-between my fingers. I don't want to believe in it as I don't want to miss out'

Taehyung has only seen the bad side of love, the dangers of it. How toxic it can be due to his parents.

But you can hardly call that love. Abuse isn't love. Neither is being cheated on or forced into an eating disorder.

Taehyung's father is the reason for Taehyung's mother's death. That isn't love. It's torture. Stockholm syndrome.

There shouldn't be a fine line between love and abuse but yet Taehyung finds himself not fully understanding the difference.

Countless times he's heard his father tell his mother that he loves her after cheating on her over and over again.

Countless times he's told her he loves her once hitting her or when calling her dangerously anorexic self fat.

Countless times Taehyung has seen this all happen in the name of love. So if that's what love is, then he wants nothing to do with it.

He even thought he was in love with Yoongi, but look how that panned out. There was no trust between them despite knowing eachother for so long.

There wasn't love between them.

So Taehyung's never seen actual love, never felt it. And yet Jungkook makes him feel so many different things.

It's scary.

Love is scary.

"Why do you believe in it hyung?"

"Because it's a sign of hope. A goal. Somewhere that I want to reach. Right now it's just beyond me, but I believe I will find the one. And when I do, I'm going to hold them in my arms and never let go"

"W-what if you don't find them? What if they don't exist?"

"Then I haven't lost anything, I'm just unlucky" Namjoon says honestly. "The only thing that can change is gaining a lover"

Taehyung doesn't know what to say. Namjoon's optimistic mindset is changing Taehyung for the better.

"Won't it hurt getting your hopes up over and over again just to have them crushed?" Taehyung asks hesitantly.

"Won't it hurt more never allowing yourself to feel your emotions fully? I'd rather get hurt a few times than constantly live in pain, never being able to be myself or allow myself to feel my emotions fully"

"Oh"

Is all Taehyung's able to get out.

Everything which he thought, every rule he forced himself to live by, is broken. Crushed. Destroyed.

Namjoon really has changed his mind.

Before Namjoon can ask Taehyung any questions, the bell rings.