25.1: A Night To Remember

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AMBROSE

I have never imagined the day that I would hang out like this with August ever again. The last time August was here felt so much like a century ago. At least that's all because I'm too distracted this past week that thinking about him was totally lost in the equation. I was on the verge of believing that I'll never survive this hell of a week but here I am pouring whiskey on my glass with August sitting at the far corner of the couch.

Things just went fast in a matter of hours that I'm still thinking about what happened back at the river. I had an extremely rough week that I just went to find solace at my favorite spot at the river not knowing that someone's going to show up uninvited. I had never ever expected that August would show up at the river right at the moment where I didn't know I needed his presence. I may have acted violent a few hours ago and that's because I've been tired and exhausted of all the bullshit that came through me this past few days. I had my thing with my parents and then the sudden revelation that I'm not their biological son. I had found hope that I would find my birth mother and perhaps talk to her. Even if I don't tell her that I'm his lost son, I'm pretty much okay with just having a conversation with her. And then all hope was lost and I was pumped up with disappointment that they moved and the disappointment went on and on.

I really have a lot of things going on and to realize that I still have something going on with August just made everything worse. I was just the same exact asshole that I was a while ago. I admit all of that but I guess I couldn't get mad at August. I've put up a wall because I'm scared that I'll just break down right in front of him. But I did. The wall that I've put up was not sturdy to withhold August's prowess. The fact that I don't want to let August explain himself only made him even more determined.

My heart was beating like a drum inside of me and I'm just trying my best to keep my cool out of the situation. August was watching me pour some whiskey on each of our glass and I'm slowly getting conscious at myself. The person that I'm falling for was just carefully observing me and I don't quite know how to react to that. I've never felt that kind of feeling before. This was obviously the first time that someone I'm truly fond of was scrutinizing me.

We had a few drinks and by the time the alcohol began kicking in, August was ready to say something.

"I'm just thinking about calling Rachel." August spat out of the blue and I've got to say I was taken aback. I have already forgotten about Rachel but now that he'd mentioned her, everything came rushing back to me. I just recalled the fact that Rachel was still August's girlfriend and I'm just the side lover. I don't even know if I'm going to call myself that. I felt a slight pang in my chest.

"What?" I was completely distraught by the fact that Rachel's name came up when there's only us in this room.

My anxiety began kicking in so much like an uninvited guest. This was supposed to be a special moment for me and August and I was just wondering why Rachel's name had to be brought up all of a sudden. She's the devil of this relationship. Her entire presence was just making the mood intense and awkward.

I understand that we both have some kind of connection to her but this was completely random and I'm not amused. I know I wanted August to end things with her but we still have to sit and have a serious conversation about it.

"I feel like I want to end things with Rachel right now." August rephrased his initial statement but this time he was gritting with such seriousness that I haven't seen from him in a while. I don't know if this was all caused by the alcohol that has begun to take over his system. I'm pretty sure we've had the same amount of alcohol but he was already letting loose. Maybe we don't have the same alcohol tolerance at that level.

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