Dancing In His Storm [BxB] √

CHAPTER 11.3: This Thing Called Tension

AMBROSE

I hated everything about the weekends. Both Saturdays and Sundays used to be fun when I was younger and I had my parents living with me. They did not care about what I did but they sure bought every toy that I wanted and it got me entertained and distracted from what's happening around me. All of my toys, the transformer robots, the spider-man and batman figures, the slingshots and the toy guns, they all kept me company and I never felt alone. Now it seems that both days fall under the category of my loneliest day. I cannot count all the weekends these past few years that have made me sadder and angrier.

I hated the fact that I have to live in this big ass house in solitary and feel bad about myself. I hated that the only noise that I hear are the birds chirping, the branches and leaves rustling and basically my own self. I wanted to convince myself that loneliness doesn't bother me but it does. Even the silence that's glued with the loneliness was so loud that it's deafening enough to make me crazy. There were times that I go out in the woods with my old slingshot and just start shooting random things. Birds, squirrels, sometimes butterflies and even a few deer. I guess I just wanted to hear them scream and get rattled by the pain.

I hated that the day seems to roll out at a snail pace that I have to ration whatever food that I have throughout the day. I hated that I have to walk around with that big ass family painting hanging idly on the hallway. It seems that whichever I go I feel it's presence gawking and judging me. It's kind of ironic that it's called a family painting when it doesn't have any significance at all. I always had this itchy urge to grab a knife and stab the painting. Maybe that way I start to feel a little bit better but I don't have the guts to do it.

I don't know what the future holds for me, I don't give a crap if it's good or not but all I want is to get out of this misery. I just have to finish high school, get my diploma and move somewhere else on my own. I'm sure my parents wouldn't even bother looking for me. They would probably sell this house for good and bury my memories on the ground.

I woke up a bit late today and somehow, I forgot that I slept here inside my room last night. I have been sleeping at the couch for quite some time this fast few months and to wake up inside my room felt so bizarre. The curtains were thick enough that the sunlight can't even penetrate it making the room so dark. I got out of my bed and walked towards the window. I opened up the curtain only to get blasted by the bright sunlight. My eyes were shocked and I was blinded for a few seconds until I eventually adjusted from the brightness. I walked passed by the mirror and realized that I was still fully naked. I stared at my full frontal and I thought I looked thinner now that I have nothing fresh to eat. My morning wood was standing tall and I suddenly felt this urge to pleasure myself.

I inched my way back to the bed, laid on my back and before I know it, I was already stroking Mr. Ambrose Junior. I began to feel good and dreamy, my body was starting to heat up as I held my shaft with such pleasure. Upward and downward, downward and upward, I continued beating my wooden sword. My body stayed tense by what I'm doing but my mind is already traveling somewhere.

My mind became so distracted by creating this fantasy that I wasn't even paying attention to who I was fantasizing. It was August. I was kissing him and he was kissing me back and we are both topless. The burning heat coming from his mouth felt so real even though it was all made up. One of my hand was holding the back of his head and the other was sliding all the way down to his stomach.

There was enough quietness inside the room that when my phone rang, it was surprisingly loud. I quickly snapped back to reality and I realized things are getting fucked up. I haven't reached my climax yet but I felt my wood began to soften so much for my disappointment. Perhaps the disappointment is coming from the fact that I don't usually masturbate and then this happened. The last time I stroked myself was probably a few months ago and that sudden urge to release was caused by the utter boredom that I was feeling.