Murder Most Unladylike Groupchat

103

Hettie 💃🏻: now it would usually be time for the father/daughter dance however the bride's father is a dick so that will not be happening.

Hazelnut 💗: ha what an excellent description of Mr Wong

Jun 🌸: yes it's very accurate

Hettie 💃🏻: Thankfully Hazel will not be dancing on her own, she will be dancing with an amazing person - not that he had any idea about it.

Hazelnut 💗: *walks over to Felix and pulls him out of his chair*

Uncle Felix 😎: what's going on, Hazel why are you dragging me onto the dance floor

Hazelnut 💗: so I can have my
uncle/daughter dance

Uncle Felix 😎: with me?

Hazelnut 💗: no with Daisy, of course it's with you

Uncle Felix 😎: Hazel...

Hettie 💃🏻: *plays the music*

Hazelnut 💗 and Uncle Felix 😎: *begin to dance*

Once, I was seven years old, my mama told me
"Go make yourself some friends, or you'll be lonely"
Once, I was seven years old

Aunt Lucy 🔍: oh that was such a sweet thing of Hazel to do

It was a big-big world, but we thought we were bigger
Pushing each other to the limits, we were learning quicker
By 11, smoking herb and drinking burning liquor
Never rich, so we were out to make that steady figure

I'mthebestpersonever 💖: Awwwww

Once, I was 11 years old, my daddy told me
"Go get yourself a wife, or you'll be lonely"
Once, I was 11 years old

AminaEM 💍: Daisy is your uncle crying?

I'mthebestpersonever 💖: omg he is

I always had that dream like my daddy before me
So I started writing songs, I started writing stories
Something about the glory just always seemed to bore me
'Cause only those I really love will ever really know me

Jun 🌸: *videoing* I am going to send this to Vincent 😏

Once, I was 20 years old, my story got told
Before the morning sun, when life was lonely
Once, I was 20 years old
(Lukas Graham!)

Little sprout 🌱: this is adorable

Alcoholisthebestmedicine 🍷: I know it's so sweet

I only see my goals, I don't believe in failure
'Cause I know the smallest voices, they can make it major
I got my boys with me, at least those in favor
And if we don't meet before I leave, I hope I'll see you later

ArrogantTwat 🌝: Bertie your Uncle is crying

Bertie 🌍: hahaha

Aunt Lucy 🔍: you're mean Bertie

Bertie 🌍: I know 😁

I'mthebestpersonever 💖: no he's a twat, there's a difference

Bertie 🌍: 😒😒😒

Once, I was 20 years old, my story got told
I was writing 'bout everything, I saw before me
Once, I was 20 years old

Mrs Mukherjee: that's so sweet, poor Hazel though, her own father didn't come to her wedding

Mr Mukherjee 👨🏾‍⚕️: I know, that poor girl. At least she has Felix.

Soon, we'll be 30 years old, our songs have been sold
We've traveled around the world, and we're still roaming
Soon, we'll be 30 years old

Inspector Priestley 🕵🏻: that is very sweet

I'm still learning about life, my woman brought children for me
So I can sing them all my songs, and I can tell them stories
Most of my boys are with me, some are still out seeking glory
And some I had to leave behind, my brother, I'm still sorry

Longarms 🇺🇸: I don't know why Felix was so surprised when Hazel dragged him onto the dance floor

ArrogantTwat 🌝: me neither

Harold 💫: I must say she is very strong for someone so small

Longarms 🇺🇸: yep

ArrogantTwat 🌝: yes that is quite surprising

Soon, I'll be 60 years old, my daddy got 61
Remember life and then your life becomes a better one
I made the man so happy when I wrote a letter once
I hope my children come and visit, once or twice a month

Idon'tgiveashit 🔪: it's quite cute ig

Soon, I'll be 60 years old, will I think the world is cold?
Or will I have a lot of children who can warm me?
Soon, I'll be 60 years old

Countess 🇷🇺: what a lovely dance

Soon, I'll be 60 years old, will I think the world is cold?
Or will I have a lot of children who can hold me?
Soon, I'll be 60 years old

Rose 📚: aww it's so cute

Mei ⚔️: Hazel's just dancing with Uncle Felix

Rose 📚: this is her wedding Mei, it's a very special dance.

Once, I was seven years old, my mama told me
"Go make yourself some friends, or you'll be lonely"
Once, I was seven years old
Once, I was seven years old

Uncle Felix 😎: *spins Hazel*

Audience: 👏👏👏👏👏

Hazelnut 💗: thank you Uncle Felix

Uncle Felix 😎: *hugs Hazel tightly then gently kisses her cheek*

Uncle Felix 😎: No thank you Hazel my dear niece.

Hazelnut 💗: *hugs Uncle Felix*

-----

Hettie 💃🏻: I now welcome you all to join the bride and groom on the dance floor.