Murder Most Unladylike Groupchat

32

Chatting on 'Best people in this fucked up family'

Uncle Felix 😎: You want me to walk you down the aisle?

Hazelnut 💗: yes

Uncle Felix 😎: why?

Hazelnut 💗: What do you mean why?

Uncle Felix 😎: Why do you want ME to walk you down the aisle, wouldn't your father be upset?

Hazelnut 💗: my father and I are not on speaking terms, besides I love you Uncle Felix you have been an inspiration to me and have helped me become the person I am today.

Uncle Felix 😎: Hazel...

I'mthebestpersonever 💖: OMG HAZEL THATS SO SWEET

Uncle Felix 😎: Yes Hazel I shall walk you down the aisle.

Hazelnut 💗: thank you thank you thank you

Hazelnut 💗: *runs into the living room where Uncle Felix is sat at the table and hugs him tightly*

Aunt Lucy 🔍: that was very sweet

Bertie 🌍: that was very cute

Uncle Felix 😎: I am very touched Hazel.

Hazelnut 💗: 💗

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Hazelnut 💗 and Longarms 🇺🇸 are chatting privately.

Hazelnut 💗: Uncle Felix is going to walk me down the aisle!

Longarms 🇺🇸: that's great

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Chatting on '18+ shit, may contain sex, drugs and alcohol 😏🍃🍹'.

Little sprout 🌱: hey is everyone free tomorrow?

Alcoholisthebestmedicine 🍷: yeah

I'mthebestpersonever 💖: yes

Hazelnut 💗: yep

Longarms 🇺🇸: yep

Idiot 🥸: I'm free

Idon'tgiveashit 🔪: same

AminaEM 💍: let me just check

Little sprout 🌱: ok

AminaEM 💍: I'm free

I'mthebestpersonever 💖: yayyy

Hazelnut 💗: 🙄🙄🙄

I'mthebestpersonever 💖: 🖕🏻🖕🏻🖕🏻

Longarms 🇺🇸: we are so much better than them Haz

Hazelnut 💗: yes we are Alex

Alcoholisthebestmedicine 🍷: where do you want to go?

Idiot 🥸: hey why don't we go to the park and have some fun.

Idon'tgiveashit 🔪: what are we little kids?

Alcoholisthebestmedicine 🍷: we could bring alcohol?

Idon'tgiveashit 🔪: I'm in

Hazelnut 💗: I in too

Longarms 🇺🇸: same

AminaEM 💍: sounds fun, what time do you want to meet?

Idiot 🥸: How about we meet at my house at 10 then go from there.

I'mthebestpersonever 💖: I'm in

Little sprout 🌱: ummm ok let's do it.

Alcoholisthebestmedicine 🍷: great, I'm in aswell btw.

Hazelnut 💗: Daisy we should ask Uncle Felix and Aunt Lucy.

I'mthebestpersonever 💖: I suppose so

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Chatting on 'Best people in this fucked up family'.

I'mthebestpersonever 💖: Uncle Felix, Aunt Lucy can Hazel and I meet our friend group tomorrow?

Uncle Felix 😎: sure

Aunt Lucy 🔍: I don't see a problem with it

Uncle Felix 😎: who's going?

Hazelnut 💗: Alex, George, Lavinia, Amina, Kitty, Beanie, Daisy and I

Uncle Felix 😎: oh so Aminia is going 😏

Bertie 🌍: ooooo oooo Daisy has a girlfriend

I'mthebestpersonever 💖: 😳🤭🥰

I'mthebestpersonever 💖: wait a minute...I never came out to you lot

I'mthebestpersonever 💖: HAZEL WONG 😡

Aunt Lucy 🔍: Hazel didn't tell us. We all figured it out. You are really obvious Daisy dear.

I'mthebestpersonever 💖: oh

Uncle Felix 😎: Daisy you forget that Lucy and I do work for the government in detection.

I'mthebestpersonever 💖: how did Bertie know then?

Bertie 🌍: I'm smart that's how I knew

I'mthebestpersonever 💖: try again, you ain't smart dipshit

Uncle Felix 😎: Bertie's gay so he's got the gay sense 🏳️‍🌈

Bertie 🌍: accurate 🤣

Hazelnut 💗: Daisy must be severely lacking in the gay sense

I'mthebestpersonever 💖: not true

Aunt Lucy 🔍: didn't you faint at the sight of Bertie and Harold kissing?

Hazelnut 💗: 🤣🤣🤣

I'mthebestpersonever 💖: fuck you Hazel

Hazelnut 💗: no thanks I have Alex, I think Amina is free sis

I'mthebestpersonever 💖: oh I'd happily fuck Amina

Bertie 🌍: ...

Uncle Felix 😎: ...

Aunt Lucy 🔍: ...

Hazelnut 💗: 📸📸📸

Hazelnut 💗: you just got caught in 4K Daisy

I'mthebestpersonever 💖: 😳😳😳

Bertie 🌍: I love you Hazel

Uncle Felix 😎: 🤣🤣🤣

Aunt Lucy 🔍: omg 🤣🤣🤣

I'mthebestpersonever 💖: 😒😒😒

Uncle Felix 😎: Daisy just remember to use protection

I'mthebestpersonever 💖: ...

Bertie 🌍: *dying* 🤣🤣🤣

Hazelnut 💗: *dying in Alexander's arms* 🤣🤣🤣

I'mthebestpersonever 💖: Hazel is Alexander reading this over your shoulder?

Hazelnut 💗: obviously

Aunt Lucy 🔍: 😂😂😂

I'mthebestpersonever 💖: I hate all of you

Bertie 🌍: go cry in Amina's arms

Uncle Felix 😎: 🤣🤣🤣

Aunt Lucy 🔍: 🤣🤣🤣

Hazelnut 💗: awww love you to Daisy, but not in the way you love Amina, I love you like a sister.

Uncle Felix 😎: I love you Hazel. You are my brilliant neice

I'mthebestpersonever 💖: what about me

Bertie 🌍: it seems as though you're a bit irrelevant Daisy, perhaps Amina should hear about it

I'mthebestpersonever 💖: go fuck yourself

Bertie 🌍: nahh I have Harry

Aunt Lucy 🔍: 🤣🤣🤣