Murder Most Unladylike Groupchat

36

Mr Wong: oh yes

Hazelnut 💗: Did you not notice that I have never liked Wong Min Su?

Mr Wong: how could you not like her?

Hazelnut 💗: She is the reason I have been ignored. She is part of the reason why my mother doesn't talk to you. I only ever tollerated her because I love Rose and Mei.

Mr Wong: What do you mean why your mother doesn't talkt to me. She doesn't talk to me because she's a bitch.

Hazelnut 💗: not true. My mother hates the fact that you had an arranged marriage. She told me that she grew to love you however her love was shattered when you were frolocing about with some pretty young thing.

Mr Wong: oh

Hazelnut 💗: dickhead

Mr Wong: I rest my case though. If you don't invite me and Jie Jie to your wedding, you will no longer be able to attend Deepdeen and I shall take you back to Hong Kong.

Hazelnut 💗: YOU GODDAMN COCK SUCKING TWATTY MOTHER FUCKING ARSEHOLE.

-----

Chatting on 'Best people in this fucked up family'.

Hazelnut 💗: *sobbing*  please help me

Uncle Felix 😎: what is it Hazel

Hazelnut 💗: My father said that if I don't invite him and his concubine to my wedding he'll take me out of Deepdeen and take me back to Hong Kong.

I'mthebestpersonever 💖: THAT DICKHEAD

Aunt Lucy 🔍: How awful

Bertie 🌍: I'm going to kill him

Longarms 🇺🇸: THAT SON OF A BASTARDLY SLUTTY BITCH

Uncle Felix 😎: Hazel if he stops paying for Deepdeen, I'll pay for you

Hazelnut 💗: what

Uncle Felix 😎: Hazel, I could bare to see you away from any of your friends. I don't know how Alexander would cope so I shall pay for you.

Hazelnut 💗: *walks into the living room and hugs Uncle Felix*

Hazelnut 💗: thank you

I'mthebestpersonever 💖: thank you Uncle Felix

-----

Hazelnut 💗 and Ah Mah 🈷️ are chatting privately.

Hazelnut 💗: Mr Wong said that if I didn't invite him or his slut to my wedding he would stop paying for my school and he would take me back to Hong Kong.

Ah Mah 🈷️: he's a nonce

Hazelnut 💗: Ah Mah, please come to England. Bring Rose and Mei with you. I need to see my family that I love.

Ah Mah 🈷️: I'd happily come

Hazelnut 💗: leave the cunt and the prick behind.

Ah Mah 🈷️: Happily, I'll be in England as soon as I can.

Hazelnut 💗: thank you Ah Mah, I love you

Ah Mah 🈷️: I love you too Ying Ying ❤️

-----

Mr Wong and Jun 🌸 are now chatting privately.

Mr Wong: is it true that you hated the fact that we had an arranged marriage

Jun 🌸: yes it's true

Mr Wong: do you love me?

Jun 🌸: no way
There's no way that I love you
You must agree that, baby, in all the time I been by your side
I've never lost control, no matter how many times I knew you lied
I have my golden rule
Gotta keep my cool no matter what

Mr Wong: is it true that you hate Sue?

Jun 🌸: And even though you've had your fun
Running around with some pretty young thing
And even though you've had one son
With someone who doesn't own a proper wedding ring
No matter what I heard, I didn't say a word against her

Mr Wong: do you care about what I have to say?

Jun 🌸: I've put up with your sh- like every single day
But now it's time to shh, and listen when I say

Mr Wong: what do you want to say?

Jun 🌸: You must think that I'm crazy
I know you wanna replace me, baby there's
no way at all
If you think for a moment
I'd grant you annulment, just hold up, there's no way I'd do that to Hazel

Jun 🌸: Well Vincent you weren't there when I gave birth to Hazel?
You're just so full of sh-, must think that I'm naive
I won't back down won't shh, and no, I'll never leave.
I was here first so that slut you love can fuck off.
I know you wanna replace me but baby there's no way.

Jun 🌸: You used to get me down on my knees
Please tell me what you think I've done wrong
Been humble, been loyal, I've tried to swallow my pride all along
If you can just explain a single thing
I've done to cause you pain, I'll go

Mr Wong: ...

Jun 🌸: No?
You've got nothing to say?
I'm not going away
There's no way

Jun🌸: you gave me this ring so I'll be your wife to the end of my life.
You may want to replace me but baby there's no way that will happen because if we get an annulment
You may love your little slut more than me but when you loose me you're going to loose Hazel and there's no way you would want that.

Mr Wong: I fucked up didn't I

Jun 🌸: and you're only just noticing?

Mr Wong: did Hazel say anything about a will?

Jun 🌸: yes she did you bastard

Mr Wong: shit