[曦澄 | XiCheng][MDZS Modern AU]: All The Things I Never Told You [~PART 1~]

〽️👁‍🗨 Chapter 77: Trust.

- I envy them, you know.

***

They had been driving for quite a while now, in silence. 

Jiang Cheng knew that they weren't going to his place, and not to the bar, and not in the direction of Lan Huan's house either.

- Hmmm.

Lan Huan didn't need to ask. He knew too well who this all was about, and he thought he knew why his loved one was so silent. The one thing he didn't know was what A-Cheng and A-Xian had talked about.

Patience. He needed patience with this one.

- They...  -  Jiang Cheng went on hesitantly, it was really weird to travel with Lan Huan in such complete silence for such a long time, traffic jams or not.  –  They can spend so much time... you know... together.  –  he mumbled.

- Is this why you are so anxious?  –  he asked carefully, keeping his eyes on the road.

- I am?  –  Jiang Wanyin was a little surprised to hear this.

- Hmmmm.

- I...  -   he wanted to explain, but the words were not coming easily.

- It's OK. I mean it. It's OK.  –  Lan Huan repeated yet once again that day.

The young bartender bit his lips and just turned to stare through the window, which now looked flimsy and makeshift, and somehow cheap  –  the roof was down again, and the car looked ridiculously small again.

- I am sorry.  –  he said in a husky voice.  –  I am sorry I didn't tell you. I didn't know how.

- It's OK. I don't care about your past. And I really dunno why people can't believe it when I say it.  –  Lan Xichen frowned a little now. It had been the same  –  with Wangji, with A-Xian, with A-Li, and now with Jiang Cheng too.

***

Was he angry now? Was he angry with him? Lan Huan looked clam, but... still.

Jiang Wanyin was biting his lips, worried and looking really anxious. Had he ruined the holiday for the both of them? That asshole Wei Wuxian had said that secrets ruin relationships, as if he was some kind of guru  now all of a sudden, huh! But... he was... Was he right?

Of course he was right, fuck goddammit! 

But...

How could you say such heavy, impossibly heavy stuff to someone you adore so much? How could he hear it, and stay? Who would stay?

He felt dirty. Despicable. Pathetic.

And he had never before thought he would regret the mistakes of his youthful years so much. He had never before hoped someone would ever love and cherish him so much, so strongly.

- Do you hate me now?  –  he whispered weakly, not daring to turn his face around.

There was a deafening silence, but Lan Huan parked the car in front of a familiar place in just a couple of minutes, and now Jiang Cheng gaped.

The sex shop???

Was he going to raid it again?! What kind of a madman was that?!

But then he blushed. He knew... what that meant.

- I will be back in just a minute.  –  Lan Xichen said quietly.