Elevator love merder

Christina's wedding

-Christina! - i called her calmingly. We were just about to walk down the aisle...Like ten minutes ago. But she just didn't move. I finished my speech to her just a minute ago, about their love, and commitment.
-Hm? - she turned around.
-Do you...want to go?
-No...Yes..Where?
-Burke.
-Yes. He wants this, and i love him. I just...need a minute...A silent minute...- she sighed.
-I am...about to become a Burke. This is not easy for me. - Izzie nodded understandingly, making her take a breath. I saw the door open, and Burke came in with a serious look on his face.
-I am ready..I am fine, i'm sorry. But i am ready. Meredith talked me down, really. I'm fine. Go, go, go, i'll be right behind you. - she said collecting her pieces.
-I am sorry. - Burke started. I couldn't believe my eyes...My eyes were huge from the surprise. Burke was the one who wanted this wedding, and my best friend who didn't. I was watching him about to start his dialogue, but Christina didn't get what he was trying to say.
-No! I can do this...I had a momentary freak-out, but i can do this. Go!
-I am sorry, but I don't want to do this. I was there, waiting for you to come down the aisle, and I knew you don't want to come. - Izzie felt uncomfortable, i could tell from the way he was holding the bouquet of the flowers Christina chose.
-I know you don't want to come, but you will come anyway, because you love me. And if i loved you, if i loved you - he said with a bigger intonation the last word -
-Not the woman i am trying to make you be, not the woman i want you to become, but you x he kept a break.
-If i did, I wouldn't be up there waiting for you. I would be letting you go.
-I am wearing a dress! I am ready. And i really didn't think i wanted this before, but i want it now! I am ready! I am sure!
-I wish that you didn't think...I wish that you knew...- he finished, and turned around leaving in the other direction.
Christina turned around, and i saw her crying. She didn't cry often, but i saw her crying. I tossed the flowers in Callie's hands, and shot her a pity look. I made my way over her, and i hugged her, trying to comfort her. Not saying anything, just being there for her. I felt her tears burn my back, where the dress didn't cover my neck.
-Mer...- she whispered after a few minutes.
-He wanted this...He ... - she chocked back her tears, not wanting to show herself weak in front of us.
-It's going to be okay. We are going to take you home. You will get out of this dress. Step by step. First we go home. Then you talk to Burke. You will make it.- i took a breath, knowing she needs me the most now.
-Mer...I can't. I can't show in front of all of those people now...I don't even know everybody...I need...-she panicked.
-Okay. You don't have to. I will talk to them. Here is the key of my car - i tossed it into Callie's hand.
-Wait for me there, i need five minutes. Go! Before the guests! - i turned to Izzie too.
They led the bride out, but she pulled away from the touch of their hands.
I opened two big white door, and started walking down the aisle alone. I felt everybody's eyes on me. I passed Addison, Bailey, Richard, Mama Burke, and kept eye-contact with Derek, looking for some comfort in there. He gave me a look filled with warmth, and i turned towards the crowd.
-It's over. You can all go home now. It's over. So over. - i fulfilled my duties, and turned back, walking through the aisle again. The pairs pf eyes turned after me. I passed Bailey again, Christina's mom, even Addison turned after me. I didn't look at anybody. I just passed the rows, running in the inside.
When i got out of the room, my legs took my running towards the parking lot. Christina was sitting inside, Izzie and Callie standing outside of the car.
-She didn't let us sit in. - Callie stated.
-Mer, will she be...okay? - Izzie asked me.
-She will....She is already better now, without him. - I sighed.
-Tell Derek that i am staying with her tonight. Please. - i looked into Izzie's eyes, and she nodded.
-And that he can stay home. - i added, and hopped into the car, at the driver's seat.
Christina's eyes weren't showing any kind of emotion. She was sitting, in a beautiful wedding dress, the usual proudness missing from her, but otherwise the same. Her eyes weren't red, she wasn't crying, or screaming, just sitting there. I started the car, driving to their apartment. On the way there, she sniffed her nose once, but otherwise, she stayed quiet. I didn't say a single word. I parked the car in front of their flat, and helped her out, with the big dress. I let her go before me, lead the way. I wasn't in their apartment before a lot of times, just a few visits. She opened the brown door, with the key from her purse. She went in, and i waited a few moments, giving her some privacy, before walking in. She was standing in front of the sofa, staring at me when i entered. I looked around, finding the apartment empty.
-He's gone. - she said, making me come out of my bubble.
-I.I.I don't think he is gone. - i told her the truth.
-I..Most of his stuff is still here. - i added confused.
-No. His trumpet was here. - she pointed to the table.
-His entire book collection, and cds...His grandmother's picture was by the bed. - she entered the bedroom.
-His luckiest scrub-cap was hanging by the ... door.
-He...He is gone...I'm...i'm free. I'm...I'm..I'm... - she started crying. I made my way to her.
-Take this off! Take this off, please! - she started sobbing loudly. - i did as she told me so, untying her necklace, and as she started ripping her dress, but it didn't come, i quickly grabbed a scissor, cutting at the back. She kept crying historically, as i pulled her dress off, leaving her in another white underdress, she stepped out of it. She held out her hands, and i took it, while she was still sobbing uncontrollably. I hugged her from behind, letting her head fall on my shoulder. The joy of her freeness was hid under the painful cries she kept letting out. I knew what she was thinking of. Mostly. I remembered, while trying to comfort her with my touch, all the times Burke wanted it more. Moving in. Telling everyone they are engaged. Getting married. She was hurried. She was pushed, but she would've done everything because she loved him. But it wasn't her. She was heartbroken now. She was heartbroken, but relieved, because she wasn't pushed into things she didn't want yet, or wasn't ready for yet. She could be herself now, but still she deserved to be devastated. She was broken up with the man she loved. She was left on the day of her wedding. I kept hugging her, until her breathing calmed down slightly, still clutching onto my hands.
-Can we go somewhere...else? - she asked me, still panting from the crying.
-Of course. You can stay with me as long as you want to. - i offered her.
-Sleepovers?
-Yeah. If you want to.
-Mhm..-she sighed.
-Want to bring something? I have your toothbrush, but
-I'll pack some things. - she said, now letting go of my hands.
I sat down to the sofa, while she put some clothes into a sports bag, with her scrubs. She stayed in the white underdress, and i grabbed her bag, while she closed the door. I went before her, opening the door of the car, sitting in.
-Pizza for dinner? - i asked her, after a few silent minutes. It started raining. I started cleaning the windscreen by pushing a button. She nodded, and i kept driving. When i stopped the car at the house, we got out, and i grabbed her bag. I opened the door for her, letting her in. I dropped her back on the floor, and got out of my heels.
-Can I just...take a shower? - she asked, standing there in the hallway. Her white dress was dirty, and her makeup was a mess. I saw that she didn't want to meet Izzie and Alex. She didn't want to see George's face, and Callie's pity look.
-Yeah. I'll talk to them. - i answered her silent question. I made my way towards the kitchen, where everybody was sitting, having dinner. Derek immediately stood up, and hugged me into his embrace.