"Hello?"
"Lexis, hi! It's doctor Palandro."
Almost immediately, Lexis' heart responded with hard, fast beats at the doctor's disturbed tone. Not only had he called him instead of sending an email this time, but he did so in less than an hour after Anthony's appointment.
Anthony, who should be in the Ellis wing right now, was who Lexis was heading towards. They were going to recap about his visit to the hospital and how many nurse's he flirted with while he was there. However, Lexis' footsteps slowed down as he came closer to the door. It was his second time being afraid of seeing the other side of one – the first being the morning he visited his sister at the hospital after the night she died.
"Yes..." He was never more uncertain, never more fearful.
Don't say it. Don't say it.
"I'm afraid I have bad news."
Lexis' hand paused on the door knob. He closed his eyes as he tried to control his breathing. "And?"
Doctor Palandro let out a long sigh, and for a moment, he kept quiet. With every second that passed, Lexis' heart died a little more. With every second that passed, the door in front of him became suffocatingly more terrifying to open.
I don't want to ever feel or anticipate his emptiness behind it. Please don't let it be this way now.
"Anthony..." Doctor Palandro began, feeding Lexis' fear.
"No." Lexis breathed.
A moment of silence followed, and the doctor immediately understood. "Don't worry Mr. Ellis, Anthony hand't left us."
A rush of relief flooded through Lexis' body. He opened his eyes as he finally resumed to breathe, and turned the knob to walk inside the room. Like all the happiness in a thought, like the smile in an image, like the comfort and reassurance made in an uplifting moment, Anthony sat in front of the TV, his eyes almost touching the screen as he played his favorite video game.
"I would have sent you something to your email instead. That's certainly something I can't express to you in words. However, I wanted to let you know something. Anthony and I talked today. I kept my promise and I didn't tell him of his near future yet. He did, however, uncover that he wasn't a stable child anymore. He knows he's sick Lexis. The amount of medication he's taking by itself is a hint. His body is becoming weaker and that's something even he can't question. The moment he thought of this, he realized that maybe you're hiding it from him, because indeed, it's life threatening.
"He said that you are probably going to be upset if one day he dies. Because you 'hate' your father and you would rather Anthony take over the Ellis Corp instead. Maybe its why you and your father are fighting all the time. He wishes he can do a lot of things for you. He wishes he can mend your relationship with your father. He wishes that at the very least, he can be with you both at the same time during the same activity, like dinner or a game."
"Anthony said that?" His heart hurt as he watched his little brother.
"Yes, he did. Though I'm calling to let you know the unavoidable. His days are numbered now. He's fighting his weakness, his stamina. I would appreciate it if you don't let him join any activities. No running, fighting, and nothing but sitting on the couch and resting or sleeping. I will also be visiting your school from now on to do regular check ups. I will be sending a group of APs to get a room ready in the Ellis mansion especially for him. He will soon no longer stay out of bed."
Lexis' nails had dug so deep inside his palm that he hadn't noticed until an intense amount of pain made its way through his wrist. For a moment, he could only stare at Anthony with a fit of hate. Hate made of love.
Love made of fear.
"Oh hey bro!" Anthony exclaimed, glancing over and seeing Lexis for the first time.
"Got it." Lexis hung up and slipped the phone inside his pocket. "I told you not to get so close to the TV. You're not going to look good in glasses."
"Oh, come on! Where is the fun in staying all the way in the back? You need to see the details to feel anything."
You need to see the details to feel anything.
Lexis stood there watching his brother. He loved him, poured out love for him more than he did for anything or anyone else. In life, there are two predominant loves: A love you give because you're expected to. And a love you hide because you're afraid it'll break you.
What's unknown is usually scarier than what you see.
And a love that's inevitable.
Anthony had stood up and began making his way backwards to the couch, however, Lexis walked up to him and pulled him into a tight hug.
The remote in Anthony's hand dropped to the rug, his eyes opened in shock.
Lexis squeezed his eyes shut, feeling more fear than he ever did in his life. He couldn't imagine, couldn't even begin to fathom a world without his little brother in it. He was his only hope into what was left of his isolated sanity.
His sister left him, left him when he was most vulnerable in his life, and now... his brother was walking down the same route, carving the distilled emotions of absolute hatred and anger for Lexis to walk on.
"Lexis, are you okay....?" The tightness in Anthony's throat was audible. He wasn't sure whether to be scared or to cry.
But there was happiness. He felt like a five year old in Disney Land for the first time.
Lexis is hugging me....
Lexis hugged him before. He does it almost every night, but the good feeling behind it disappeared when Anthony once overheard Jessie talking to Lexis about it about two years ago. That's when Anthony realized its more of a need than a want. Which was fine by him, it just didn't mean the same.
But right now, Lexis was hugging him. Out of choice. It felt awkward and strange. And good. Oh, how much it felt felt good.
Lexis cleared his throat and pulled away. "Yeah." He looked into his little brother's eyes, looked at the tears that was overflowing in them. "I'm fine."
He turned around and left the room, going to the only place he undoubtedly knew for sure would be vacant during lunch hour.
He might be the one death is taking, but I'm dying out and into life every moment I think of the emptiness he'll leave behind.
YOU ARE READING
F.A.I.T.H.
Romance"I was broken. Nothing, no one could fix me. Until you came into my life again. I wish I had gone with you that day instead of him. Because, now I can't imagine how I spent the previous years of my life without you by my side. You are my savior. You...
