Murder Most Unladylike Groupc...

By CatLover_3695

42.6K 1.1K 7.4K

The title gives everything away. WARNING contains mentions of Drugs, sex and alcohol. More

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21

331 11 35
By CatLover_3695

Chatting on '18+ shit, may contain sex and alcohol 😜'

I'mthebestpersonever 💖: omg Hazel you are dead

Hazelnut 💗: ikkk 😭

Longarms 🇺🇸: if you don't make it out alive Haz I love you so much

Hazelnut 💗: I love you 3000

Hazelnut 💗: omg my father has just messaged 😭

Idiot 🥸: good luck

AminaEM 💍: good luck

Little sprout 🌱: what's wrong with Hazel's dad

I'mthebestpersonever 💖: he's fucking terrifying

Idon'tgiveashit 🔪: wow he must be bad if Daisy is scared of him

-----

Hazel is now chatting with Father

Father: Wong Fung Ying...

Hazel: Good morning father.

Father: what was that message you sent me last night?

Hazel: um I'm not sure...

Father: Hazel you weren't drunk were you?

Hazel: ...I was wasted

Father: ...

Hazel: I am sorry

Father: Finally you did something stupid

Hazel: I'm sorry

Father: I was beginning to think that I raised you to be a coward

Hazel: I am still confused

Father: Hazel, I raised you to be a good studios girl however I was hard on you and never let you have fun unless it was related to reading or puzzles

Hazel: Well I like reading and puzzles

Father: I know however I was beginning to think that I was so hard on you, I scared you away from doing anything fun.

Hazel: surely you would have realised I was fine when I became a detective

Father: Even then you always followed Miss Wells, you were just doing the right thing

Hazel: I like detecting

Father: I know, I am curious as to what has brought you out of your shell.

Hazel: I...umm...

Father: Hazel what is it

Hazel: I have a boyfriend

Father: HAZEL WONG

Hazel: yes

Father: nevermind, does he treat you well?

Hazel: yes, he treats me like a queen

Father: How do you feel about him?

Hazel: I love him father, I truly love him.

Father: wow...um that is a shock, when can I meet him?

Hazel: You've already met him 😂

Father: Have I?

Hazel: yes. My boyfriend is called Alexander.

Father: the tall American boy?

Hazel: yes

Father: Damnit I owe your mother £10

Hazel: Did you have a bet?

Father: I thought you'd end up with the other boy, the Indian one

Hazel: 🤣🤣🤣

Father: well congratulations I suppose

Hazel: thank you father

Father: just promise me you would have sex until you are married

Hazel: 😳😳😳

Father: you know what I trust you, you are my Hazel after all.

Hazel: um thank you father, have a good day

Father: you too, love you Hazel

Hazel: love you too father.

-----

Hazelnut 💗: hello

Longarms 🇺🇸: are you alive?

I'mthebestpersonever 💖: omg was your father really mad?

Hazelnut 💗:

I'mthebestpersonever 💖: now that is shocking

Idon'tgiveashit 🔪: that is unexpected

Alcoholisthebestmedicine 🍷: haha he thought he raised you to be too much of a goody two shoes

Hazelnut 💗: wait there's more

Hazelnut 💗:

Longarms 🇺🇸: HE DIDN'T KILL YOU!?

Hazelnut 💗: no

I'mthebestpersonever 💖: he was about to shout at you 🤣

Hazelnut 💗:

Little sprout 🌱: He thought you and George would end up together?

Idiot 🥸: no just no

I'mthebestpersonever 💖: oi that's my best friend, any boy would be lucky to have her

Longarms 🇺🇸: true

Idiot 🥸: True despite the fact that I had a small crush on Hazel when I first met her I would never have taken her away from Alex

Hazelnut 💗: you liked me?

Idiot 🥸: yeah

Hazelnut 💗: well what can I say, I am fabulous 🤩

Idon'tgiveashit 🔪: hahaha, George you had better not like her anymore

Idiot 🥸: oh god no, now she's like my little sister.

Longarms 🇺🇸: so I did have a right to be worried 😖

Hazelnut 💗: what

Longarms 🇺🇸: part of the reason why it took me so long to ask you out was because I thought you liked George

Alcoholisthebestmedicine 🍷: 🤣🤣🤣

Idon'tgiveashit 🔪: LMFAO 🤣🤣🤣

Hazelnut 💗: Alex you are so stupid. I never liked George one bit. It was always you.

Longarms 🇺🇸: I still thought you liked George when we were on the ship as you were avoiding me.

Hazelnut 💗: I was avoiding you because I was in love with you however I was certain you didn't like me back - you send very confusing signals

Longarms 🇺🇸: oh

Hazelnut 💗: Did you still think I liked George after I kissed you in Fallingford?

Longarms 🇺🇸: oh no that though died very quickly

I'mthebestpersonever 💖: wait...you guys kissed in Fallingford?

Idiot 🥸: I was gonna say

Longarms 🇺🇸: 🤣🤣🤣

Hazelnut 💗: Oh Alex

Alcoholisthebestmedicine 🍷: I'm still confused, when did you guys kiss at Fallingford.

Hazelnut 💗: Hmmm it must have been Christmas Eve

I'mthebestpersonever 💖: when I was 'dead'

Hazelnut 💗: yeah

Little sprout 🌱: I'm so confused, I thought you guys only found out that you liked eachother a month ago

Longarms 🇺🇸: oh no haha

Idiot 🥸: ???

Idon'tgiveashit 🔪: 🧐🧐🧐

Hazelnut 💗: we staged that

AminaEM 💍: I am loving this 🍿🍿🍿

Alcoholisthebestmedicine 🍷: omg me too it's amazing ☕☕☕

I'mthebestpersonever 💖: so you staged finding out that you liked eachother

Hazelnut 💗: yes, it was quite ingenious actually

Longarms 🇺🇸: we had been dating since Christmas Eve sooo for about 2 months before we staged the 'discovery'

Idiot 🥸: Why'd you stage it?

Hazelnut 💗: We wanted to see how long it would take you to realise. After 2 months it showed us how oblivious you were to romance so the reason why it was easy to tell we were dating was because we made it mind-numbingly obviously

AminaEM 💍: Jesus Christ you are so smart

Longarms 🇺🇸: we are a lot more descrete than you think we are

I'mthebestpersonever 💖: wow Watson I'm impressed

Idiot 🥸: you two are...

Hazelnut 💗: the best detectives ever, we know

Longarms 🇺🇸: you go on and on about how you are more secretive than us...

Hazelnut 💗: ...but now you have to admit that we are the best.

Alcoholisthebestmedicine 🍷: very impressive and hilarious

Idon'tgiveashit 🔪: you are brilliant

Little sprout 🌱: wow, who's idea was it

Longarms 🇺🇸: Haz's

I'mthebestpersonever 💖: of course it was, that's my bestie

AminaEM 💍: so basically you tricked everyone into thinking you weren't dating for two months when you in fact were?

Hazelnut 💗: yep

AminaEM 💍: You others must be shit detectives

Longarms 🇺🇸: 🤣🤣🤣

I'mthebestpersonever 💖: AMINA 😠

Hazelnut 💗: they aren't shit detectives, they are shit at spotting romance when it is right in front of them

Longarms 🇺🇸: 🤣🤣🤣

Idon'tgiveashit 🔪: sounds about right🤣

Alcoholisthebestmedicine 🍷: yeah 🤣

Little sprout 🌱: it is rather funny 😂

Idiot 🥸: I am still in shock 😯

I'mthebestpersonever 💖: so am I George

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