The Joker x Reader Imagines 💚

How To Make A Baby

The Joker really wants a baby and doesn't know how to approach the subject. Last time you two talked about it your answer was an unmistakable no and he doesn't take that kind of negative attitude from anybody, including his girl. Or so he likes to believe...

You are reading a book in front of the fireplace, sitting on the soft rug and leaning your back against the couch. The Joker is resting in his favorite armchair, reading articles about How to make your girlfriend happy on his cell. He wants to convince you to have a baby with him and things have to go the right way because he is aware he can't force you on this one. J reads the list again and decides to try the stuff he found, maybe it will work.

1. Tell her you love her

He holds his phone with two fingers like it's infected with some contagious virus, takes a deep breath and utters with emotionless voice:

"Pumpkin, I love you." It sounded so cold, flatter than the flat green tea latte he orders from Starbucks all the time. He hates the taste but it's green. Yeah, well... it makes sense to him.

"Awww, that's nice J," you mumble, not really paying attention. You always have to sift through what he says because he sure says a lot of things. Most of the times you just pretend to listen and find it easier to just go with the flow.

It didn't seem you cared about his first effort and he passes his fingers through his hair, annoyed: "What a bunch of nonsense, who wrote this crap?! I should kill them," he thinks to himself and notices there is/are no name(s) at the end of the article. Dammit, how is he supposed to punish the culprit if he doesn't know who it is? That makes him even more irritated but decides to continue.

2. Tell her she's beautiful

For this one J believes he needs to change spots so he comes on the couch behind you and sits so you are trapped between his legs. He starts massaging your shoulders, his gold bracelets clinking in your ears.

"Ahhh, it feels nice," you whisper, closing your eyes, enjoying the relaxing moment.

"You're such a pretty doll, Princess," he leans over and tells you, waiting for a reaction. You take his hand and kiss his laughing mouth tattoo, then keep it on your face, going back to reading. That worked better, he smiles, satisfied with the accomplishment so he continues:

"Do you remember when we first met? You annoyed me so much at the meeting I followed you to your car because I wanted to kill you."

You snort at the memory and turn the page:" Oh, yeah, how could I forget?"

"...and then I saw you bending over to reach your glove compartment with that short skirt and I realized you had no underwear on."

"Excuse me?! I did have underwear on," you protest, looking up to him.