natasha / scarlett one shots

johansson ~ a

~ ED ~
⚠️ trigger warning : eating disorder ⚠️

I haven't been feeling like myself lately, i've been really insecure and ashamed of myself both with how look and just who i am as a person.

I never think i'm good enough for everyone i especially don't think i'm good enough for my girlfriend Scarlett. She's this amazing person with an amazing career and not to mention she's absolutely stunning. I'm just a nobody, well that's not entirely true i use to be a model that's how Scarlett and i first met we did a shoot together a few years ago and we got closer ever since.

When we met i was trying to get out of the modelling industry, i just hated how toxic it was getting and how much hate models would get for the way they looked and that's not why i go into it.

When Scarlett and i first started dating and i was searching for new career paths i may have let myself go a little bit. Not like over the top but i wasn't modelling anymore so i wasn't constantly watching what i ate.

Scarlett never said anything she always loved me for who i was and just for how i looked so i didn't really mind.

That was up until recently, one day i was walking down the street when i saw a newspaper stand and on the front cover of one of the magazines there was a photo of me. The title read 'Y/n Y/l/n struggles with her identity and gains 30 pounds' in big black letters.

I gasped seeing it and how much they had photoshopped the photo of me to make it look like i had gained so much weight. I threw the magazine down and quickly ran away, i was so ashamed and horrified.

When i got home luckily Scarlett wasn't there, i went straight up to our room to look at myself in the mirror. 'oh god i am fat' 'maybe they're right i have gained weight' 'how could anyone love this' I thought to myself as i stared into the mirror.

I was brought out of my thoughts when i heard the front door open. I quickly wiped away my tears and fixed my clothes when i heard Scarlett coming down the hallway. "honey? are you home?" She asked getting closer to our room.

"ugh yeah i'm here" I spoke out trying not to sound like i had been crying.

"oh hi honey, how was your day i thought you'd be out longer" Scarlett came up giving me a hug, i hugged her back feeling calmer in her presence.

"uh yeah it was ah it was good. i just wanted to come back to you though" I said into her neck gripping her tighter.

"is everything okay?" Scarlett pulled away to cup my cheeks.

"yeah everything's fine i just missed you" I lied pulling her into a kiss to stop anymore questions.

"okay, well i'm gonna make some lunch do you want anything or have you already eaten?" I thought about and i hadn't eaten in like 4 hours so i was getting hungry but i didn't want to gain more weight.

"oh no that's okay i already ate" Scarlett smiled pecking me on the cheek before leaving to go to the kitchen.

~ two weeks later ~

So it's been two weeks since i saw that article, i've also gone online and seen a bunch more other stuff about me gaining weight and reporters and journalists saying nasty things about me.

I haven't be eating properly, i'll usually have one small meal a day just so Scarlett doesn't worry. She works so much that she's never home to see me not eating so i just lie and say that i am.

I think it's working though with the weight thing, i think i'm losing weight which is good. I'm too scared to weigh myself cause i don't want to get disappointed or sad so if i just keep having one small meal a day for a while i should be back to normal.