Nefarious

C141 - Impure

I could very well hear what Alex answered, but for some reason, my mind wouldn't take in it properly. "What?" Jace exclaimed. "That's why we're here. The majority of the Dizarys along with many of the Caizars are certain that Alex won't survive. They were ready to give up on him, so we came here in hopes that you could help in some way," Vera said. "Of course we will," Jace answered determinately.

The others began discussing something, which left Alex and me with some privacy. His thumb stroke over my hand as a small frown was forming on his face. "Your skin feels cold," he said, almost whispering. My sight was fixed at his gentle strokes, and it felt much more relaxing than it probably should've. His presence and voice caused a strong feeling of calmness and safety to take over, and I truly didn't want to kill that feeling or ruin the moment. "The weather's colder," I answered, hoping he wouldn't question it further.

There were countless unanswered questions, yet I couldn't bring myself to ask any of them. Sitting in the large window sill, I tried taking in the fact that he was actually back. He was finally standing right before me, fully able to achieve physical contact again. Of course, his looks had changed a bit, but he was still the Alex I'd known for years. 

Jace sounded calm, yet moderately worried. They were talking about Xylan and how he was dangerously close to becoming the leader instead of Alex. Although I was somewhat paying attention to that conversation, Alex seemed to lack motivation and interest for it. "Can you hear anything?" I questioned worriedly. His head moved slowly, and his responsiveness wasn't as hoped. A faint nod and a returned eye contact were all he gave me. "I don't think you should be standing for too long, Alex." "You're right, Valerie. We should go to another place," Jace agreed.

My place was finally an option as Hayden had stepped away, temporarily at least. Xylan wasn't yet aware of Alex's return either, so we decided to stay there as for now.

Almost right after we got to my place, Jace asked to talk to me alone. I began trying to say no, but both him and Alex thought otherwise. "You should trust Jace by now, Valerie. He's a good adviser and will do you no harm. I'll be here when you're done," Alex reassured me. I cast a glance at Jace, seeing him nodding in agreement. "Right, I should be as open-minded as possible at a time like this," I said, remembering Zane's final message. Making decisions on my own won't be my strategy any longer, and neither will I deny people to share whatever with me. 

Alex left Jace and me alone to talk, and although he was leaving for some minutes only, it felt nerve-wracking already. The last time he left, it was meant to be temporary as well, but it turned into a long-lasting hell for both of us instead. I wasn't prepared to go back to that, especially not now that he'd just returned.

"Listen, I know it's painful for you to watch Alex in such bad condition, but you can't change around him. Don't encourage him to feel weaker, and certainly don't let him know of your ongoing transformation," Jace whispered. "Wait, you expect me to pretend as nothing has changed, and at the same time keep my biggest and most vulnerable secret from him?" I frowned. "He's not himself yet. In order to gain strength he needs blood, and because he doesn't have that, we have to be careful regarding stressful situations. He can only handle so much before he'll fall back into a possibly fatal condition," he answered. "You've lived on blood your whole life. Why has it suddenly become a struggle to get a hold of it?" I questioned sceptically. "Because it would have to be yours in this case," he sighed. "Then take mine!" I said, almost raising my voice accidentally. "Careful now, Valerie! Your blood isn't pure anymore. Did you think turning into a vampire wouldn't affect your human system, or what?" he shook his head, still whispering. "But if I've lost my ability to strengthen Alex then-" I started. "You're still of importance to him. Since I turned you and not him, he could still die if you die. Your blood, however, won't help him anymore," Jace explained.