Tied Together with a Smile

Chapter 14

Charlie POV

I sighed as I cleaned up my arm. I mean I already messed up so it's fine. Silently I realized that Taylor would find out, or I would have to tell her. Better get it over with. "Hey Tay? I need to talk to you." "Coming baby!" She shouted from the other part of her house. Since the tour was on a short break she'd invited me to stay with her which I gladly agreed to. As soon as my eyes met her electric blue ones I felt the familiar lump. "I'm really sorry." Was all I could manage. Shockingly Tay knew, her eyes softening at most likely my image. "Oh love... Do you want to talk about it?" I shook my head, staring at my feet. "Cuddles?" I asked almost dead silent. "Of course baby girl. C'mon let's go cuddle in bed." She lifted me up and I koala hugged her as I'd done a lot since she started calling me her little koala. Once we made it there I remained koala hugging her, some tears spilling out. "Shh it's okay baby I'm right here angel" she husked. Recently I'd been feeling really touch starved and like I was a burden to Tay. "Am I a burden?" I stuttered out and my girl immediately shook her head "of course not baby girl, why would you think that?" She asked, using her index finger to gently force my head to look at her. "I'm just your stupid backup dancer with all these issues. Your THE Taylor Swift." My voice trembled. "Sweetheart, you are so incredibly wonderful and talented, I knew from the moment I saw your audition video. And you forget that I had these issues once too. Just because I'm okay now doesn't mean the thoughts still don't occasionally come back." Clearly the shock was on my face. "Can I ask you something Tay?" She nodded "how did you come to terms with it? You having anorexia. How did you come to terms with that?" I felt Taylor sigh. "Honestly I don't know. It was definitely difficult. Your never gonna have an easy time admitting your sick. I think it was when my mom said she wasn't gonna watch me kill myself. When Jack started threatening to make sure I couldn't go on if I didn't eat. That's when I started to grapple with the fact that maybe it wasn't just a diet. It took a month or 2 for me to fully come to terms with it. I really did believe that it was just a diet. That the concerns from media was just media being stupid again. Now, years and years later I realize I was so so sick. My hair was coming out, my nails wouldn't grow, I lost my period." Her electric blue eyes seemed vacant, lost in a memory. Although I was still cuddled against her I managed to rub her arm, bringing her back to reality. Now those beautiful vibrant eyes were filled with tears. "I'm so sorry babe I didn't mean to make you cry. I just can't seem to grasp that I have anorexia. I know I do, I just can't accept it."

Hi! Here's this! Suggestions? Opinions?

-Brooklyn