If you are struggling, feel like giving up, and don't know where to turn you're not alone.
Suicidal thoughts, depression, self harm, sexual abuse, bullying, grieving, eating disorders, mental illness, toxic friendships, toxic relationships
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Hello strong girl!! Yes, you're strong because despite the storms of life, you still manage to go by and despite how tough life can get, you've shown it you're tougher by staying strong, lifting your head high and living it to the best of your abilities. Life is tough, I can attest to that but then we're tougher, We're tough girls, we're STRONG girls.
well, I hope you're doing just fine and even if you aren't, I hope you'll be at the end of this post,
I'm comfort (weird name right 😀) I'm one of your newest admins and today I'm here with a little story and some small advice,. I type this in gusto and I'm happy that I'll be sharing stories and lessons I've learnt on this tough ride called Life,
I've had bouts of insecurities, worse, I've drowned in the river of depression and low self-esteem, I've hated myself so much that there were days I'd shut myself from the outside world,
Everyone has a story and a little bit of mine do I intend to share with you, I was barely nine when my dad left for the arms of another woman, I was heartbroken, shattered, dismayed and ALONE, no good-byes, no explanations, he just left. I had my first bouts of depression then, I'd spend hours in my room crying, it was the most terrible and heartbreaking news for me then and each day I drowned in sadness, I really loved my dad and so waking up one morning to meet his absence and then the thoughts that he'd never come back again wasn't so pleasant, I loathed life and I stopped believing in fatherly love, I began to have a strong aversion towards men, I slowly began to hate them.
Things went downhill, poverty set in because my dad used to foot our bills but when he left without a trace, my mum had to do menial jobs for my siblings and I to get by, the experience wasn't anything funny and I used to get cranky when I get to see my peers bond with their dads, it was so heartbreaking, gradually I got used to not having a dad around,
Then 2017 came with Acne, severe and heartbreaking acne, when I mean acne, I do not mean that one or a few pimples that pops up during your period or stress, no, I'm talking of your entire face covered with pimples and dark marks,
I tried all remedies and listened to the advice of medical personnels but then it showed no signs of stopping, I'd look at myself in the mirror and see that my face was a mess, I became a centre of discussion to others, they'd make rude remarks about me and I was hurting so deeply, I'd cry myself to sleep each day, I resolved to hide my flaws in make-up, and that was what I did, I'd cake my face in foundation but then my acne got worse and it didn't help matters,
2018 came with comparison, there were days when I was awfully intimidated by the feats of my peers and literally speaking, those days weren't the best,
I hated life, I hated social media, I hated comparing myself to others but no matter how much I tried to get out of it, it just wasn't possible, I really didn't see any reason to live other than for God and my family, well that gave me little hope,
Today I'm stronger, my problems came to make me stronger, my dad's not yet back, that's okay, I've learnt to cope without one, my siblings too( my mum owns a business establishment now and my lil sis even fixes some spoilt devices at home 😀) yes, that's how strong we'd become,
My acne is not yet gone (almost completely gone), I've learnt to accept myself as I am, love myself, adore myself because no one's gonna do it better than I do,
You see, not all my problems are yet gone but I've learnt to adjust, love myself, be happy, because yes, happiness is a choice and I chose to be happy.
Henri Nouwen says:
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Life would come with unsolicited painful packages, Life would come with heartbreaks and disappointment, Life would also come with fortune, Life would not always be fair, be strong!
One thing I've discovered is that hard times don't last long, If they come, they make us stronger and I can attest to that, You can't continue sulking in that corner where you are, you don't have to build walls around yourself because of your past experiences, You can't stop loving just because your heart was broken, You can't continue seeing yourself as a failure just because your friends got an A+ in that test and you're stuck with C's,
Self comparison with others?
don't do it, it's not gonna help, you'll be sailing your ship towards the sea of depression and self hate if you do.
Leave that spot of self-pity, Leave that spot of trying to please others and displeasing yourself, You see those walls of mistrust, fear and resentment you've built?, Now is the time to break them because that's the only way light can get in.
