𝕋𝕙𝕖 𝕊𝕥𝕣𝕠𝕟𝕘 𝔾𝕚𝕣𝕝𝕤 ℂ𝕝𝕦𝕓 ☁︎☀

Monday ~ Self ~ Gigi

Hi guys! It's Gigi here. Last week I realized that by each person only updating once every three weeks, we were only talking about one third of what we wanted to talk about. So, from now on, I will be posting on three topics every time I update so that I can help all of y'all as much as possible. Well, let's get into it.

#1 Self Hate

I can always feel it. The burning hate I feel for myself. It screams at me.

Broken. Beaten. Worthless. Hated. Disgusting. Stupid. Ugly.

Those words ring in my head. I doubt myself all the time. It's evil and hard. It hurts. The thought of living in my own skin hurts.

I know so many people, beautiful on the inside and out, but they can't see it. It plagues my mind as to how people so beautiful could be scarred so deeply. Perhaps there is beauty in pain.

This constant pain. The hate and utter hopelessness. Maybe, just maybe, it'll help me become a better person. The agony, the misery. All temporary.

There is beauty in pain. A torn, broken beauty. It finds the bleeding hearts and makes them stronger. It takes the ripped apart pieces of a saddened soul, and wraps it in bandages. It makes us stronger. We'll tear ourselves down, but we'll fly higher than ever before once we're past the climb back up.

Every rose has thorns. Every smile has the wear and tear of past promises unkept. Every heart has its cracks. Every person has their story. Ours are yet to be told, and yet we still feel like our stories don't deserve to be told. We have only seen the terribleness of our story, and we believe there's no happy ending.

We won't ever be void of doubt. Never be exactly the same again, but we'll heal. After the wound gets torn open again and again, we'll heal. The cry for help in the dark will never be silent, but it will be quieter. We will get better. We will see the rainbow after the storm. We'll see the happiness drawn from the pain.

Because pain is temporary. Wounds heal. Scars fade. Broken hearts are glued back together. Cages will be unlocked. Shackled will be shattered. We'll be freed.

Self hate is one of the hardest things to overcome, but hard does not mean impossible. It means it'll take a while, but it's worth it.

You are worth it. You are beautiful. Inside and out.

But it doesn't feel like it, does it? There's no point in talking about something that we can't see. If we can't see it, why should believe people when they say it's there? Well, maybe it's because beauty is not a thing of sight, but rather a thing of mind. It doesn't matter if they think you're beautiful if you don't. Because what you think matters.

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, not the eye of the giver. You'll never see your beauty unless you let yourself look through someone else's perspective. (Not a bully's perspective though, that's just ridiculous. 😂) Look at yourself though a kinder perspective.

Here's my challenge for you guys this week. Look at someone who you love, but doesn't love themselves. Can you feel that? The hate, the anger? Imagine yourself where they are right now. You understand, right? The hate of ones mind and body? Look at them through your eyes, you love them so much right? Now look at yourself through their eyes. They love you for who you are. Why would they love you if there wasn't anything to love?

There's something lovely about everyone. Everyone deserves love. Why would you deprive yourself of that?

Quote of the day: Love everything you do, even the mistakes. Mistakes mean you're trying. Succeeding means you made enough mistakes to figure it out.