𝕋𝕙𝕖 𝕊𝕥𝕣𝕠𝕟𝕘 𝔾𝕚𝕣𝕝𝕤 ℂ𝕝𝕦𝕓 ☁︎☀

#Notyourfault |

Disclaimer: Certain sections in this post may be disturbing to some readers.

Reader discretion advised.

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Fault: responsibility for an accident or misfortune.

It messes up your mentality.

It puts voices in your mind and psychologically changes you.

Questions fill your mind,and grief fills your heart, and no matter how you try and get away from them, the shame, the self blaming, the guilt don't leave.

Years pass.

You get older.

But the pain remains.

And it is hard to heal when you feel ashamed.

What are you blaming yourself for?

Is it that you didn't fight back?

Is it that you didn't say no?

Is it that you felt aroused or seemed to like what was happening?

Is it the clothes you were wearing when it happened?

Let's look at the definition of abuse now.

Abuse: use (something) to bad effect or for a bad purpose; misuse.

So, if you were misused, taken advantage, and anything was forced upon in any way that is sexual abuse.

Unfortunately, it doesn't seem that way to you.

Someone else did this to you, yet you're pointing the finger at yourself.

I want you to look at yourself from a different point of view for a few moments.

Imagine what happened to you, whatever it was, happened to someone you love.

Imagine they didn't fight back.

Imagine they were wearing "revealing" clothes.

Imagine they didn't say no.

Would you blame them the way you're blaming yourself?

The only one to blame is the one that inflicted it upon you.

You aren't to blame for what has happened to you at all, gem.

Every story is different, but as for the guilt of arousal during sexual abuse.

Sexual arousal during sexual abuse is not pleasure, or giving consent.

The body's natural response to sexual contact doesn't mean you were okay with it, it doesn't mean you gave consent.

Just because you didn't fight back doesn't mean you wanted it to happen.

Just because you were wearing certain clothes doesn't mean you invited it.

Just because you didn't say no doesn't mean you were okay with it.

Alot of people are paralyzed with fear, overwhelming fear during sexual abuse.

Fear that stops you from doing anything at all.

It doesn't make you weak or at fault for it occurring though.

It's quite the opposite actually.

You're alive and you're breathing; you're literally so strong.

You survived it; no matter how many scars it has left on you; YOU ARE HERE.

And there is healing.