𝕋𝕙𝕖 𝕊𝕥𝕣𝕠𝕟𝕘 𝔾𝕚𝕣𝕝𝕤 ℂ𝕝𝕦𝕓 ☁︎☀

No 🛑 ~ Rylee

Hey guys! It’s Rylee and I’m back with another new post! So this is the post I was talking about in my last one. So I honestly don’t know how to word this. Or go about this but I will do the best I can. So the last time I wrote about something like was back in November…? I think..? I don’t know. I honestly can’t remember anymore… I have a bad memory sorry. Okay, now I’m just stalling. Let’s get on with this post.

So today I wanted to talk about something a lot of teens go through. And it needs to be talked about. I wanted to talk about this topic because first April is Sexual Abuse Awareness Month as well for those of you who may not know. And second because not so long ago I went through this myself. And now I will get into a little story and you will know what I’m talking about when

I get there.

So my mom has this friend who we will call Juliet. Juliet and my mom have been friends for a long time now. Juliet has a son around my age. He’s almost a year older than me. In fact I was suppose to share a birthday with him. Which both of our moms were super excited about. Of course that didn’t happen because of my stubborn self. We will call Juliet’s son Tucker. Anyways growing up I barely even knew Tucker. I never talked por hanged out with him. All I knew was what my mom told me about him. That he was about one year older than me and we were suppose to be born on the same day. As well as some other things. That I will keep private because that’s embarrassing.

I officially meet Juliet and Tucker when I was in fifth grade. Juliet worked at my school and help me and other kids who needed the extra help. I don’t know why but after meeting Tucker I didn’t exactly like him. I just didn’t have a good impression of him. As we got older me and Tucker started having more classes together. We started seeing each other everyday. Tucker would never even try to talk to me most of the time. And as we grew older I found that he could be kinda rude. Which didn’t help what I already got from meeting him for the first time.

As I got to the age of having crushes and all that my mom started teasing me about Tucker. Since she was friends with Tucker’s mom she found it funny if we would end up together. I didn’t like the idea and wanted her to stop. Especially since I really don’t like Tucker at all.

Now flash forward to this year. I have one class with Tucker. And that class is English. He’s in my sixth period English class. I still see him everyday. We still don’t talk or anything at all. Which is why I found it weird when I came home and checked my Snapchat to see he had messaged me. For some reason this sent bells ring in my head. Red flags waving everywhere in my head. Me being me out of curiosity and to see if what I think is right I open up the message and read what he had sent. He sent this: “Hey can u keep a secret?” I didn’t know what to do or say so I respond with: “Umm… Yes why are you asking me?” And I saved those two messages. It didn’t take me that long to realize that message was sent during sixth period. I also noticed he checked my story. Which rarely ever happens.

I waited to his response. I finally got it around ten that night. But I didn't dare open it. I waited till the next morning when I told my friend Kimmie. I wasn't going to open it so dead. His response was asking me to promise him I wouldn't say anything and to not save the messages. More red flags popped up in my brain. Me and my friend both had the same idea at what might happen at this point. I didn't respond until later at driver's ed. By then he sent me a hey. Trying to get my response. My friend Kimmie took my phone and told him it depends on the secret. He didn't answer. All he said was “You won't tell anyone this stays between me and you.” Kimmie replied with sure.

At this point I was afraid. What if it happened. What I feared was going to happen become reality. I couldn't even focus on driver's ed at this point. The next thing I knew was that he he messaged me saying “You might think this is weird but we can trade secretly and never tell anyone.” At that moment my fear became reality. Why me? My friend replied with a “What.” and he then asked if I didn't know what trading is. Kimmie reply that I know. He replied with “Like sending pics and don't freak out.” Well he was a little too late on the freaking out part. That happened the moment he messaged me.

My friend replied to him again. Telling him I wasn't that type of girl. And I wasn't. That's something that makes me feel super uncomfortable. He kept at it after he basically got a no. He replied with “I know but it can be just this once. I swear I won't tell anyone.” Meanwhile my sister was taking pictures of the conversation to save for later. He again. Kept at it. “Plz just this once. Come on Brianna. Brianna.” I was freaking out so bad. But I had to focus on driver's ed. I couldn't be on my phone. My friend once again told him. “No, what do you not get from I'm not that type of girl!” She clearly wasn't happy with him bugging me like this.

Then he messaged back. “Fine nvm.” I thought that was the end of it. But I couldn't be far from wrong. He added “I thought you were cool.” He was trying to get under my skin. Getting me to say yes. But that was never going to happen. My friend was mad that he was being a big jerk by then. She grabbed my phone back and sent a new message. It read: “Thought who was cool bc u sure aren't.” “You're funny.” Tucker replied clearly not happy by the outcome of all this. Kimmie replied one last time before I finally blocked him on my Snapchat. “I will take that as a compliment.”

I thought that would finally be the end of it. And that was. But I was still faced with some problems. The feelings of I had when Kyle hurt me came back. I felt helpless and didn't know how to tell people. My feelings were a mess. And I didn't even know how to tell my parents. Especially my mom. I mean this guy was my mom's friend son. How was I supposed to tell her. And if I did what would happen to their friendship?

So I didn't tell her. Even though deep down I know I should. I just felt like I couldn't. I didn't even tell when my sister suggested I should. I only talked to her about it when one of my friends mom heard about what happened and informed my mom because she believes my mom would do the same thing if her kids were in trouble. When she found out she talked me. And told me I should have told. We talked to my Grandma and decided it was best not to tell Tucker's mom. Everything is handle now and it's slowly getting better. My emotions is still pretty messed up. I see Tucker everyday still. But once I walk into class I sit down and look straight forward or to the right. I can't stand looking at him for more than a second. What Tucker did was sexual harassment. And it should tell someone when something like this happens to you. It's serious. And you are never alone because many teens go through this as well. midnightdeadroses