ScarletVision Life

Stress Has Become My Life

If you have a younger sibling(s) and your parents hardly notices you.  That's been happening to me for about 16 years now. My sister is annoy, a snub, and a spoiled brat. I can't stand her and we both are spoiled and I hardly act spoiled.Don't get me wrong, I am thankful that my parents giving me food, something to drink, and a roof over our heads. They support both me and my sister and I appreciate what they sacrificed. But it makes my sick that my parents would most times let something slide with her, but when it's me, oh no, I get in trouble for it even when it's her. My parents say that they love me and my sister equally, but when something happens, they go straight to me first. I can tell that they love my sister more just by showing it. They do care and love me, but they love my sister more because she is beautiful, skinny, has a boyfriend, popular, and get involved with stuff that I might want to be involved with. I will be honest with you guys, I am a little jealous of my sister because of her wonderful life. When my sister broke up with her first boyfriend, I said that I would do anything for her like go to the movies, go shopping, or other stuff. But she just uses you to get to stuff. When she asks to borrow something and she thinks it's her. I'm so done of playing her games. My parents might fall for it, but not me. The only people who do notice, care, and love me is my grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins.

The reason I brought this up is because this week has so far been the worse week of my life. I retook a test and failed it and have to make it up again. I have bunch of test tomorrow and Friday and I am coming down with something. Today, my sister won't shut up for mouth and I didn't do anything to her. I had to do a bunch of homework and I ask my mom if she can make me grilled cheese (because I felt like it) after she is done eating. I wasn't rude or bossy to her, but she said yes. When I was done with most of my homework, I walk out of my room and saw that my mom was done eating. So, I thought she just finished her dinner and wait for a few minutes. It was almost 7 p.m. and my mom still didn't make me anything. Instead she was looking in my sisters' yearbook and I almost lost my mind. I ask for one little thing and she doesn't do it. So as a grown up, I made my own dinner (Letting you guys know that I don't eat meat.) and had a hamburger bun with cheese and ketchup (Yes, I know that is weird. I don't blame you if you think it is weird.) and watch something on Youtube to calm me down and don't overreact. 

I know there's some people out there who are more stress than me, but I think we all have different things that makes our life stressful. Like last week and this week is making my brain going crazy. Most times there is a moment in my life that is saying I should give up, but somehow there's something saying to me that it would get better, just give it time. I wish there was a sign to tell me to give up or keep going. But, I only have less than two weeks of school left. I haven't rest since before the hurricane and I am a totally hot messy. I don't feel like my old self since then too. Most times I don't know what to do and I overthink it (Not of being bored.).

The reason I am telling you guys is because I want to let it out and tell someone. And you guys listen and understand me. And I thank you very much for that. I hope you all understand on what I am going through. Thank you guys so much.

Bye