"I will always love you, I thought you knew that"
In which she writes him letters
that turn into so much more.
(marauders era-order of the phoenix)
COMPLETED
book one of the Stargazing series.
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Sirius paced around the room, feeling trapped. He could hear the footsteps and muffled voices of the people in the house, trying to look for something useful. But being in her house, in her room, it overwhelmed him.
Everything was so quiet, yet so loud. His mind was racing, and the only think he could do was think about her.
It didn't matter that the Order was in the house looking for a clue, it wasn't leading them into anywhere.
The image of Harry's face when he found out what had happened was imprinted in his brain. The sound of Remus' screams were marked in his heart. He was now free, but for what? If the only reason he was free was now taken away.
Sirius felt angry and defeated, if he would have woken up, he would have gone with her, or at least sent someone with her. But instead, he woke up trying to find her. When he read her note, he waited, but something was pressing his chest, telling him there was something wrong. Hours later, they found her stuff laying in an alley.
The feeling of anger and frustration was present around them. People were looking for her all over, and the Order was around her house, trying to get a something useful to track her. He couldn't be near them, it made everything feel more real.
He sighed heavily as he passed a hand through his hand, a habit he had gain from being with Samantha all the time. The only thing he could do besides look was wait, and being in her room gave him peace.
His eyes travelled around the room, and he found himself staring at the same pictures over and over again. With heaviness, he walked towards the bed and sat on her side. The bags under his eyes were noticeable, and he wonder if that was how she felt all those years ago.
Sirius pursed his lips, trying not to let his tears win over. He needed to be strong, just like she had been after everything.
He layed down in the bed and closed his eyes, trying to breath properly. His head rested on the pillow that still smelled of her, and he tried to remember simpler, happy times. But the feeling of defeat and impotence was too overwhelming.
Just as his rage was about to consume the moment, his head turn, and as he did, he felt something something under the pillow.
Immediately, his hands were looking under the pillow and he took out a journal. Sirius slowly sat up and frowned, passing his hand through the smooth cover.
Maybe he shouldn't have, but perhaps it was a clue that could be used to find her, so he did what his gut was telling him to do.
He didn't know what he was expecting once he opened the journal. Coordinates, maybe a note or code that could tell him of her whereabouts. But what he didn't expect was a journal full of letters, and all address to him.
