Purple Roses ° Sirius Black ✓

90 | the order of the phoenix

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𝓓𝓮𝓪𝓻 𝓢𝓲𝓻𝓲𝓾𝓼,

I have been practicing a lot,
just like I promised you.

Even if I'm good at spells,
that doesn't mean a little more knowledge is going to hurt me. I want to practice until it becomes second nature, and I'm ready for everything and everywhere.

Every time the Order is in meeting,
I listen while feeling sick to my stomach, and sadness rushes over me.
So many atrocities, so many evil deeds.

Everyone is brave and always ready
to fight, even if it's for a last time.
I admire that of them, I hope the
world does it too.

I know I never write about the order here because in this journal I only write to you, and the order is private.
Well, even though sometimes I use it
to let out my thoughts and feelings about everything else, this journal is
still about you.

We have lost people,
courageous people who sacrificed their lives for the greater cause.
They will always have a part in my heart.

My usual spot is in the middle of the room, with you sit next to me.
Our friends sit around us, and I can't help but think of it like as a protective bubble. Even if we're not in battle,
we still keep an eye for each other, making sure we're alright.

Today, after discussing some matters, Dumbledore decided that we should
take a picture.

At first, everyone thought it was a joke and laughed it out, it made had been
to lighten the mood, but the profesor keep his small smile in his face and pointed at the main area.

So we all did.
We all followed each other
and awkwardly chose a spot for
the picture.

I didn't know where to go until
I felt your hand in mine, and I let
you guide me.

I thought we were going to the back
or something, but turns out you
chose the front.

So there I was, in between you and James, while Lily was by his side. Marlene a few feet away from us,
smiling big. I was a little disappointed
that Remus chose the spot with the Prewett brothers, but I didn't
say anything. Things have been a little rocky with you two, it breaks my heart.

We all posed in front of the camera and smiled. No one knew how much they have left, or if they were going to
die today, tomorrow, or in a week.
But we all stood there, smiling because at that moment we were safe.

I don't know how much time I have left,
or you and our friends, who are our family. But one thing that I know for sure is that at least I know we have
each other.

Even when death finally comes
to claim us, at least we know we did what we had to and because we wanted to. At least we know we had a family
and love.

At least I have you.

Goodbye Sirius, I'll see you soon.

𝓢𝓲𝓷𝓬𝓮𝓻𝓮𝓵𝔂,

𝓢𝓪𝓶𝓪𝓷𝓽𝓱𝓪