✿ ✿ ✿
𝓓𝓮𝓪𝓻 𝓢𝓲𝓻𝓲𝓾𝓼,
I have learned over the years
that people come and go.
No one can stop that.
No one should feel empty or sad,
or having confusion mixed with anger over somebody's actions.
I shouldn't feel responsible for
someone else's actions.
But it hurts. It hurst like hell and
I want the feeling to stop.
Why can't everything just stop?
I shouldn't be here feeling empty
for trying to fill someone else.
I shouldn't have the feeling of
being worthless for someone who clearly didn't see worth in me to begin with.
I don't want to cry for something
that I will later regret, but I don't have control over it.
Everything is just so confusing and dark, I feel that it's slowly surrounding me,
I can't breath.
No matter how hard I try to
not think about it, my mind keeps reminding me everything.
I'm torturing myself.
I don't know what to do.
I feel so lost, so trapped and heavy.
I can't breath without crying,
without shaking.
I just want stop feeling this way.
I just want everything to stop.
I just want my brain to stop thinking.
It's not my fault.
That's what I keep repeating myself.
It's not my fault.
I didn't know, but I should have.
I could have done something, anything.
I could have prevented it.
I could have made a difference,
but I was so caught up in my own head that I didn't, and I hate myself for it.
I don't know how to feel.
What am I supposed to feel?
I just want to shout at the
sky and ask why.
Just, why?
𝓢𝓲𝓷𝓬𝓮𝓻𝓮𝓵𝔂,
𝓢𝓪𝓶𝓪𝓷𝓽𝓱𝓪
YOU ARE READING
Purple Roses ° Sirius Black ✓
Fanfiction"I will always love you, I thought you knew that" In which she writes him letters that turn into so much more. (marauders era-order of the phoenix) COMPLETED book one of the Stargazing series.
