#143 Infection

12 4 3

by xanabanana66x

by xanabanana66x

Infection by @CoyKoi84

There was slight confusion at the beginning with whether Freddy was a human or a dog. I would take out that bit about the dog.

Description was brilliant!!

I liked how Freddy had layers and depth. Great development.

Numbers spelled out look more formal.

No speech marks needed for thought. Just the italics.

Dialogue wasn't formatted right. (The dialogue tag needs to be in lower case).

Good interwoven plots and POVs with the characters all in the coffee shop. That was done well.

Overall, a fantastic opening that I would 100% recommend to a friend. It felt like a film I was watching in my head!!

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