Ineffable ~ Good Omens One Shots

Buzz [fluff] -Ineffable Bureaucracy-

crazyfishperson requested some Ineffable Bureaucracy and I deliver

Most would think it was just a normal walk in the park between two lovers. Too bad those people were just typical humans. Beelzebub had no respect for them. They were just concerned with the angel that walked beside them. Their hands intertwined, a smile on Gabriel's face.

Gabriel was happy. Not only because he was having a nice walk with Beelzebub, but because he was getting away with being a hypocrite. This was Gabriel for you.

Beelzebub was not as obvious as Gabriel in terms of their mood. They were delighted to be with their angel, yet an apathetic "resting bitch face" hung heavy. Gabriel was the first person to point out to them that they have a resting bitch face. Beelzebub's response to that was a slap to Gabriel's pretty little angel face.

Speaking of a pretty little angel face and a moody demon, Aziraphale and Crowley just so happened to be feeding the ducks in the same park. Ducks hated Crowley because they sensed a snake and someone who killed their kind because of its 'humor aspect', but Aziraphale would usually be able to get them to stay long enough to eat the bits of corn they'd throw out.

Beelzebub liked ducks. Their liking of ducks was one of the more softer things about them. It wasn't a huge shocker when they tugged on Gabriel's arm and pulled him to the pond.

"Hey Gabe can you like maybe miracle some seeds?"

Gabriel smiled that stupid smile he does and said, "Awe Beelzebabe. You like it the duckies

Beelzebub closed their eyes and said, "Yes, Gabriel I do like the duckies. I also like wiping that stupid smile off your face by giving a nice slap to it."

Gabriel mumbled something inaudible. Beelzebub sighed, "But then I'd kiss it better because I love you more than I love the ducks."

Poor Crowley had to hear Beelzebub's full speech. Aziraphale went to get ice cream, leaving Crowley to deal with being near the two. It was quite annoying to hear Beelzebub and Gabriel tell each other how much they hate-love each other. They were still going on when Aziraphale got back with the ice cream.

You would think that Beelzebub and Gabriel would have noticed Aziraphale and Crowley staring at each other, but no. They were too caught up in each other.

Beelzebub even smiled at Gabriel.

Gabriel kissed Beelzebub.

They laughed and talked, while Aziraphale and Crowley just stood there, unable to take their eyes off them. That was until Crowley said, "You two are sure making a buzz over there. If you're going to complain about me and Zira, maybe you should figure out what you're complaining about."

At that point Crowley and Aziraphale started walking by them. Beelzebub tried to kick Crowley in the leg, but honestly their legs aren't long enough to be able to kick anything that can move. It makes their black belt in karate seem pointless. They honestly do find being short pretty annoying, but they use it as a practice of power. When they're down in hell, and too short to reach the cookie jar they can just yell at someone else to do that.

Gabriel on the other hand just knows to bring them cookies. Uriel makes the best cookies.

Offering Beelzebub and cookie was able to calm them down. Flies like sweet things. Flies also like pieces of crap. Luckily Beelzebub had both.