WARNING: Self harm and suicidal thoughts
Your p.o.v.
You woke up and looked for Castiel. He wasn't in bed with you and he wasn't in the bunker either. Sam and Dean were gone too. 'Maybe they're just on a hunt and they'll check in later' You thought. You decided to pray to Cas to see if he was listening.
Cas?! Where are you?! No response. Now you started to get upset. 'Maybe they left because they don't love me anymore' You thought. 'They Probably did leave me because I'm a burden to them. I just want to die!' Little did you know, Cas was hiding behind a wall, listening in on your thoughts.
'Oh no Y/N. Don't do this' Cas thought. He decided to come out of hiding, but act like he hadn't heard anything. Y/N? You called?
Cas! I thought you weren't gonna come.
I always come when called. What did you need?
I woke up and nobody was here. I was getting worried so I prayed to see if you were listening. You looked at him with regret.
Y/N. I know what you were thinking.
You looked at your feet and tears started forming in your eyes. You tried hard not to let them fall, but they fell anyway. You hoped Cas hadn't seen them but he did. You didn't want him to think you were weak and depressed.
Why didn't you tell me? Cas said softly.
I didn't want you to think I was weak. You kept your head down.
Y/N. Bumble Bee. Look at me. You lifted you head slowly. Sweetie, I can help you through this. Just tell me when you have these feelings and I will be there for you. I won't leave you alone to work through it yourself. I will help you if you just tell me please. He looked at you with loving eyes. I can't live without you, Love. You nodded slowly. You couldn't hold it in. You fell to the floor and broke into tears. He kneeled on the floor beside you and pulled you into his chest. You sobbed into his chest for a few minutes.
I'm sorry, Cas. I can't do it
Yes you can, Bumble Bee, just call for me and I'll be there. Just ask for help before you hurt yourself. You nodded you kept him close.
Please don't leave me Cas. Please.
I won't Sweetie, I won't.
A few hours later
Cas left after a few minutes of hugging and pep talks. He made sure you were alright before he left. He said he would be back in the evening. You decided to take a short nap. When you woke up, Cas was still gone and you started feeling emotional. You walked to the bathroom and washed your face.
If you don't like reading about self harm, skip ahead. Just don't read the next paragraph.
-Ellie
You grabbed your razor and started cutting. You made a few cuts and started shaking from your sobs. 'I have to tell him.' You thought.
Cas? You said quietly. I'm sorry Cas. I should've called you.
Cas appeared and kneeled down in front of you. He healed your cuts and cupped your face in his hands. Sweetie. Why didn't you call me?
I had to do it Cas. I know it's not good but I needed to feel pain for being a burden to you.
You're not a burden, Honey. We all need you. I need you. I love you. Please don't do this to yourself. Promise me. Cas looked at you with hurt in his eyes.
I promise, my angel He pressed his lips to yours passionately. You kissed him back and pulled away after a few seconds. You rested your forehead to his.
I won't do it again, my blued eyed angel.
Thank you, Bumble Bee. He helped you stand up and guided you to your bed. Get some rest, Love
Ok Cassie He walked over to the door about to leave. Hey Cas?
Yes Y/N?
Can you stay with me, please? You really needed the comfort.
Of course, Sweetie. He walked to the other side of the bed and laid down next to you, wrapping his arms around you. Goodnight Bumble Bee.
Goodnight, my angel
690 words
I know this one's longer but I needed to get my point across. If you have suicidal thoughts, tell someone. Let others help. Always keep fighting, You are never alone. -Jared, Jensen, and Misha. Anyway, I hope you guys enjoyed this one! I was fangirling way too much while writing this!😁😍
-Ellie
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Castiel Imagines
FanfictionJust a bunch of imagines with our favorite angel! Also some smut, later on in the book. ;)
