Broken String

CXXXVII

The car glides to a halt in front of another ugly building, this time on the other side of Brisbane. They've been quiet, very quiet, in fact Eddy doesn't think either of them have spoken since they left their street. He's been too busy trying not to get nauseous like he was last time, but he has no idea why Brett's been so quiet. He glances at him as he turns off the engine.
"Hey. You okay?" he asks. Brett grins wryly but he doesn't look at him.
"You're asking me if I'm okay?
"Um, yes, of course." Eddy shoots back in surprise. "What, I'm the only one allowed to be upset?"
Brett is quiet for a long, long moment, looking out of the open car window. The air on the other side is balmy, though faintly smelly because they're right by the highway. It promises to get hot today already. Eddy can hear Brett's breath, slightly laboured, in, out, in, out. Whoa. Is he that nervous? He's never known him to be like this, outside of when he auditioned for the con, and last year, before that competition.

"I need to tell you something." he says then, very quietly, still not looking at him. And now he's starting to freak Eddy out. What the hell is going on with him? He needs to tell him something now?
"Um... okay?"
"I know this is not the right time but I need to tell you before..." he blinks and suddenly his weary eyes are on him. "Oh God, I can't believe I'm saying this. I don't want to be your best friend anymore." he whispers urgently.
"You don't?" Eddy expels before he can freeze to the seat, before he can crash, and burn, the chasm beckoning, waiting for him, sucking him in for all eternity. He can see it opening now, coming towards him, because didn't he always know this? Wasn't this always coming?
"No." Brett croaks. "I need to be more and Eddy... I know we'd said when you're better but I need you to know now, now before we go in because I need you to know that it doesn't matter what the doctor says. It doesn't matter if you're dying, or in a wheelchair for life. None of it matters because..." his lip quivers as his soft voice crescendos and eyes bore straight into him, through the orbs right into his soul and through the other side, filling his universe with new. "I love you, Eddy. Not like I used to. But more. I love you and I need to be... with you. Please. Will you have me?"
Every breath has left Eddy and joined his filter in Alaska, just for a moment, taking all conscious thought along. His world shifts on its axis and everything he knew before flies out into orbit, like it never even existed. He blinks and stutters in a breath.
"Wh-what. Will I have you as what?"
Brett's eyes are wide, and moist, and they float and shimmer. His soft, pink lips open, shaking softly like he's nervous, more nervous than he's ever seen him, in fact. His hand is on the steering wheel, the knuckles white.
"Boyfriend? Partner? Whatever, Eddy. Whatever. Have me any way you want me, if you want me. I've never loved anyone before, I know that now. It was always you, always. Have my heart, have it, it's yours anyway. Any way you want it."
How could there be any helping the tears that flow up, that start making their way down untouched cheeks, how? The world spins anew as his cells align in a neoteric way.
A better way.
He wants him.
He wants him.
The new world tips and nudges him to speak. 
"Oh my God." he manages at last. "Oh, Bretty, I love you too. I can't... I can't..."
A slight, slight smile, more of a twitch, a small hint of relief on the face of the man he'll love forever.
"You can't?"
Breath stutters into Eddy's lungs, coming back from Alaska or maybe it's new breath, for a new world.
"I thought..."
"You thought what? That I was only half in it?"
"I wasn't sure." Eddy breathes. He's crying, of course, and a tiny part of him knows still why they're here, that they should get inside.
"Neither was I, for a minute." Brett admits. "But Eddy. Please. You're killing me, here. Answer me?"
The soft, hoarse admission jerks him out of his frozen state. His wit and his breath fly back from Alaska, leaving the filter behind wherever it's been hidden. Probably in some glacier. It doesn't matter. He won't need it any more.
"Bretty. Of course I want you." he half sobs. "I love you too. I've wanted to tell you every night for the last week."
"You did?"

It's elation, pure, unadulterated elation like he's never seen, spreading on this face he knows so well. Eddy nods as a tear splashes on his lap. Brett's lips spread wide and he raises his hand, wipes the next tear away gently. It's so sweet it makes yet another well in its place.
"Okay. Wow." he says hoarsely. "There are a million things to say but we need to get inside or you'll miss a very important appointment."
"Y-yes. Oh my God. I'm going to face the doctor like this." Eddy gestures at his teary features and a disbelieving giggle escapes his lips. But Brett grins freely as he closes the window and gets up in one fluid move, appearing at Eddy's door not ten seconds later, his hand out to help him into the chair.
"Oh well. Who cares what he thinks. They always think I'm your partner anyway."