Broken String

CXXVI

"Todd."
Todd's head whips around to the hallway door. 
"Hey. He okay?"
"Yeah, fine." Brett smiles. It's a good smile, actually. It relaxes something inside Todd that's been tense for days. "He's on the phone to his mum. Where's Ian?"
Todd grins.
"Con. He's doing a duet with some violin girl at the presentation next week so they had to wait for a room."
"How does he never get injured?" Brett shakes his head. "Seriously. The guy practises what, four, five, six hours a day?" He walks over and sits next to Todd on the couch. And look, they could have a conversation about Ian's practice habits but is there any point? Clearly Brett has something to say.
"What's on your mind? Date go okay?"
The second he says it he knows it was the wrong word. It's only a small fall, of Brett's face, but a fall all the same. "Um. I mean..."
"It's fine." Brett grimaces. "I mean, you're right, that's what it was. Yeah. It went okay."
Todd blinks and gropes for words that are subtle, meaningful. He can't find any so he blurts. 
"You don't like the word 'date'?"
Another grimace, and a hint of colour over the cheeks, still paler than normal, like they have been for days, on and off. 
"It's not that. I think I like it a bit too much." 
Todd's eyebrows feel like they touch, for just a moment. 
"And that's a problem, how?"
Brett shrugs and looks down. His eyes shoot to the door, but they must have a moment. Todd knows Mrs. Chen. She's not about to hang up after two minutes, she'll want every detail of the doctor's visit. Brett takes a deep breath. 
"Um. Expectations, I guess."
"Yours or his?"
Now he looks up, subito forte, his eyes so wide, the brown dot in them floating in an ocean of worry. 
"His. I know what mine are." he whispers. "But I'm so scared, Todd. I'm trying so hard not to fuck it up."
"Bretty Bang." Todd says as his hand slides, touches a knee encased in black jean. "You won't."
"How can you be so confident?"
"Because I've seen you, you moron. You've never been like this."
Eyes shoot to knees again. 
"You're right. Fuck it."
Todd grins quietly because he knows his opening and he'll take it. I's a good time for a joke, you see. Lighten the mood.
"And that is news how?"
Brett raises his middle finger and shakes his head. His face lights though, and some of the colour on the pasty cheeks is subtly restored.
"Look, Brett... just do what you feel, yeah?" Todd tells him. "I don't think you can go wrong."

Brett is quiet for a long, long moment, but Todd resists the temptation to fill the silence with questions, or advice he hasn't asked for. A full minute flows away from them unhindered until Brett takes a quick breath, his eyes shooting back to the hallway door.
"Um." he says. "Can I ask you something?"
Todd raises one eyebrow. 
"As opposed to the rest of this convo?"
"Yeah, fuck you. Seriously, though?"
"Yes." Todd nods. "Anything."
"Um. Okay." Another glance to the door and Todd knows in that moment that this is something he wouldn't have considered asking a week ago. "How... I mean... how does it work for guys? Is it the same as girls? Jesus, it's been a thousand years since I lost my virginity and yet that's exactly how I feel again. I mean... like... do they like being massaged? Wooed? What the fuck does foreplay mean?"

It's so, so hard not to smile. I mean, the smile wouldn't mean anything bad of course but it would look that way to Brett, Todd knows that very well. It's just that it's so adorable, and his heart swells because he trusts him enough to ask. 
"I don't know very much about girls." he says then, once he's sure he has his lips under control. "But yeah, I'm guessing mostly the same stuff works. Massaging, yeah. Of course. Don't forget the butt cheeks. Just think of what you yourself would like to happen, I guess."
Brett doesn't say anything in return, he just stares at him, maybe past him, mouth slightly agape, that same floating look in his eyes. Then he nods and crosses his legs. 
"Take your time." Todd adds. "It only gets more intensive when you wait to... you know... go to the bull's eye. Every once in a while." He grins as he thinks of the little interlude in the practice room he had with Ian just yesterday. "Not that going straight for bull's eye doesn't have its place, as well."
Suddenly Brett grins too, and nods. 
"Yeah, that one I think I've noticed. Jesus. But tonight... he took me on a. Yeah. A date. You're right, it was a date and I want to... thank him, I guess. Show him... well. That I appreciate it. Okay. Thanks, Todd."
Todd shrugs. 
"Any time. I'm sure he knows, though. Have fun, I guess."

He watches Brett as he gets up awkwardly, turning his back quickly so Todd won't see he's already hard from just thinking about foreplay and sex. 
As if Todd has suddenly gone blind or something. As if he cares, anyway. 
It's simple, really. 
He wants those boys to have the whole world.