Becoming Mothers (Marina fanfiction)

Chapter 1

Maya's POV

"Honey, I'm home" I steped into our apartment after a very long 24h shift.

Today was one of the worst shift I have ever had. From a young age I was always controlling the situations I was in and if it was not possible I freaked out. It was the worst feeling ever, standing there and knowing that you have lost control over a scene...
I needed my wife.

Look at me, Maya 'monogamy is for the weak' Bishop - well nowadays it was DeLuca - Bishop - was running home after a terrible shift into the arms of the love of her life.

"In here, Bella" she shouted from our bedroom

I walked towards the room and I saw the best view I could possibly imagine. My beautiful Italian goddess was laying on the bed with her hair floating around her head. I leaned against the doorframe as I smiled at the sight of her.

"Stop staring, Bambina" she giggled as she sat up and looked at me

I walked up to her, only to sat in her lap with my legs each side of her. I looked deep into her beautiful eyes "How was your day, baby?" I whispered not wanting to ruin this moment.

Even if I have the worst day I always made sure she was loved and had every opportunity to express her feelings and thoughts.

"Ohh mamma mia, it was super long" no matter how long we've known each other her voice still gave me butterflies "At some point I thought every baby in this city wanted to be born today. I had two regular deliveries, three C-sections one of them was an emergency one but thankfully all the mamas and bambini are fine." she smiled proudly "After that I tough Jo how to change a baby's position in the womb. I guess the Vagina Squad is unbeatable"

"I'm sorry, what?" Did she said what I thought she said or was it another incorrect American Idiom?

"Vagina Squad" she laughed at my confused face "We call ourselves the Vagina Squad, something like Mark and Avery did back then, they called themselves Plastic Posse, at least that's the rumour among the people who knew them."

"Ohh okay, but next time please let me know when you join a squad with other people, which includes genitals" I said half jokingly

"Hmm, Maya DeLuca-Bishop are you jealous at my intern?" she giggled

"Me jealous? Never" I could feel my cheeks heating up

"How was your day, Bella?" she asked.

My mood droped immediately. I have come a long way with the help of Diane but talking about my feelings was still hard. Especially after a day like this. I was trying but today I felt like running away from my feelings again.

" It was fine" I said as I tried to get off of her

Her arms grabed my waist firmly as she held me back, keeping me still.
"Maya don't shut me out, please" she was practically begging me. I looked up to see sadness and worry in those eyes I only wanted  to see happiness and love. I let my feelings take over me but it had a price...

"I'm sorry... I'm so.. So sorry" my whole body began to shake. "Carina you're the best thing that has ever happened to me. I can handle my career being broken by protocols and ignorant males who thinks I'm only a pretty, blonde olympian who cannot run a station properly, because I can come home to you every day and hold you. You're my biggest motivation, my other half and I love you more than I could tell or show you."

" I love you too, Tesoro!" she kissed me gently

I needed to be strong and tell her what happened."We had a call. A car accident with two passengers in the vehicle  and one on a motor. Be-Beckett... He... He made a call "I felt my eyes were burning from the tears as I tried not to break down" It was a terrible call... I... I tried... I tried to warn him... He... He didn't listen...He shouted at me saying that I had my chance and... And only if I could have thought with my brain .... Instead of my ovaries... I-i could still be a captain... So I should just stand down and follow orders this time... "I felt Carina's hand stroking my beck as I realised I was sobbing by now" We... We could have... I could have save them... If-if I would still be the Captain.... It... It was so bad... I stood there... And... And watch them die on the side of the road... Only... Only because Beckett wouldn't listen to.... To...."

" Bella, you're having a panic attack. Look at me." she lifted my head up "Eyes only on me. Good. Now breath for me. Brava ragazza. Siete al sicuro con me. (Good girl. You're safe with me)

I buried my face into her neck as she spoke to me in Italian. Over the year she realised even if I only understood a few word her native language helped me relax in situations like this.
We stayed like this for five more minutes until I regulated my breathing. I squeezed her a little bit tighter to let her know I was back. I didn't want to move, I needed to feel her as close to me as possible.

"What do you need Bambina?" she asked softly

"Just hold me" I was embarrassed that I was showing weakness even if it was just me and her.

"I'm never letting you go" she laid back with me on her chest. I listened to her heartbeat as I felt myself drifting into a sleep for the first time since I left for my shift.

Carina's POV

I was so proud of her. Two years ago she would get up and run until she collapsed on the side of the road, but now she was speaking about her feelings and allowed me to hold her when she needed me the most.

I treasured every moment like this. Just laying on top of me as I stroked her head knowing that she was safe in my arms.

I hated Beckett.

I hated him more than I hated Jack.

This was not the first time Maya came home in a state like this. I may not know a lot about fire but I have heard enough about him to know that he didn't have what it takes to be a good captain.

I remembered when Maya told me about the time when he left the keys in the engine and a drunk boy crashed with it. After the accident he didn't secure the location and an artista dropped the fire sticks which lit up the gasoline of the truck. Not to mention that my wife and Andy was on top of the engine when it blowed and had to jump off of it. What kind of Captain does that?

And after this he had the audacity to call Maya incapable of running the station?

She would do it better blindfolded than he did. I didn't trust him at all.
It was almost dinner time and I was sure Maya hasn't eaten since the morning she left.

"Bambina it's time to wake up." I kissed the top of her head

"hmm no... I... I want to stay like this forever" her sleepy voice gave me butterflies every time.

"How about pizza and than we can stay in bed until it's here" I suggested knowing that she would never say no to that

"Fine. I'm gonna order it, don't go anywhere." she climbed off of me still sleepy. She was so cute.

Not even two minutes later I heard a loud noise and a scream from the living room.

"Bella, are you alright?" I sat up quickly - Bella?! MAYA ANSWER ME?!

No reply....

A/N:
Hey everyone!

I started to write again and I hope you'll enjoy this story just as much as I do when I'm writing it.

English isn't my first language I'm trying my best to not leave any grammatical mistakes sorry if you still find some.

I wanted to treasure Carina's ethnicity so there will be some Italian monologues as well. I don't speak Italian (yet) so the power invested in me by Google helped me wrote those lines. Again I apologise if you're a native speaker and those sentences aren't right.

I'm happy to read any comments so feel free to leave some. My DM's are always open if you want to talk.

Please enjoy the slow burn.