#49 (Why Do I Control Myself?)

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I would let myself live,
If only I didn't feel so dead.

I would let myself love,
If only I didn't hate myself.

I would let myself care,
If only I had the heart.

I would let myself cry,
If only I didn't have to be strong.

I would let myself forgive,
If only my friends said I was allowed to.

I want to feel alive.
I want to have self love.
I want to care.
I want to have time to cry.
I want to be allowed to forgive.
I want it all back,
Just hold in my control again,
And let the real me out of its cage.

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