Jackson State- Part 2 JS2

Home is Where the Heart Is

Jermaine's POV

Its Been About Two and a Half Days since Tiara Basically kicked me out of the House . Ive Been Staying at a Nearby Hotel For the Time Being , Just trying to Respect her Wish and give her Space and time to think . After all if she's Upset and Stressing It Not only Puts her In harms way , it also puts our Kids in harms way . So Staying away from her until she calmed down , or was ready to talk was best for everybody . It Was pure hell having to take care of business all day , Meetings , Training , Interviews and Now that she was Pissed Off with me , Running the T-shirt Line . I was Doing all Of that and having to come back to a Hotel room and lay on somebody else Sheets , at this Point I was over the whole thing . I was Determined to get back into my House with My wife and unborn kids , If I thought my Insomnia was bad before its only gotten worse without her Next to me at Night . Hopefully by Now she would have calmed down , and Be level headed enough to talk , If Not she was gone have to see my face for a Few , Cause I had things at the house I needed , and I was all out of Clothes to wear . First thing When I woke up was head Home I was probably heading into the lion's Den , But that was a Risk I was willing to take . When Pulling up to the Gate , All I could do was Pray she didnt go all Waiting to Exhale On me , I put the Code in and entered , Putting my game face On . I walked In and smelled Food . So I Went straight to the Kitchen and there she was sitting at the Kitchen table alone , A table for 15 with One Person sitting there . I walked over and leaned down to kiss her , but she gave me the Cheek . I gave her a Half Hug and went for it .

Jermaine: Sooooo , You Cooked

Tiara: .........

Jermaine: Smells Good

Tiara: ..........

Jermaine: Ok

I fixed myself a Plate and sat down at the Far end of the table , and Started eating , glancing up at her occasionally .

Jermaine: These Grits have salt in them

Tiara: Mmm Hmm

Jermaine: But I thought you couldnt have salt

Tiara: Its Kosher

Jermaine: Oh

Jermaine: Soooooo

Tiara: Why Are you here ?

Jermaine: because I live here

Tiara: I thought you agreed to stay away until I was ready to talk to you

Jermaine: Come on Tiara , You and I both Know that Could be Forever .

Tiara: And

Jermaine: And , Im ready to talk about it like two Adults

Tiara: Ha !

Jermaine: Whats Funny ?

Tiara: you Are , What did you go away figure out what Type of Game you was gone spit ? I mean did you Really think I was gone Fall for you Poor Me Act ?

Jermaine: Its Not an Act , and Im not asking for your Sympathy

Tiara: Then what are you asking For ?

Jermaine: You to Listen to me

Tiara: I Said , I would Call you when I was ready to talk

Jermaine: And I Said , Im Ready to talk !

Tiara: Who you Raising your Voice At ? Check Yo Self

Jermaine: Check Myself ? Really Tiara ?

Tiara: Yes Really , I was Having a Wonderful Day Until You Showed your face Dirty Dog Diaries .

Jermaine: Whatever , You better get use to it , Cause Im Here to stay

Tiara: Ha! Like Hell

Jermaine: watch Me

Tiara: Jermaine, Leave

Jermaine: Im not going Nowhere , But Upstairs

Tiara: You Know Me , So you Know How hard it is for me to talk to you in this Tone and Not scream and yell , Or lash out and swing at you .

Jermaine: Do what you got to Do , When You ready to talk Ima be Upstairs .

I get up with my plate and Walk upstairs , And not to the guest Room to the master bed room . this was My House , Our House and As Husband and Wife we Gotta Learn to talk it Out , If that means I have to stand my ground then thats what I was going to do , for the sake of our marriage , I was going to Nip this Problem in the Bud . About 30 minutes later she comes into the Room , Rolls her eyes at me and then walks over to her side of the Bed and takes a seat . She picks the Remote up and changes the Tv to Lifetime and throws it back down , I look at her smack my lips and get my Ipad Out the Draw Next to the bed , And Start Looking over new Sketches for the T shirt Line with Khols and Rue 21 . As Im scrolling threw the Designs , I hear her Huff and Puff , I look over at her out the corner of my eye and she's laying there with her feet propped up and hand on her Belly . I go back to looking threw the Sketches when She does it again , I ignore it and Continue what im doing . Then she does it again . I put the I Pad Down and Look over at her .

Jermaine: So whats Up you wanna talk or you auditioning for the 3 little Pigs

Tiara: Did I say I wanted to talk

Jermaine: So your Auditioning for the Role as the Wolf in the 3 little Pigs

Tiara: ........ *folds her Arms*

Jermaine: Aye Dont act like that wasnt Funny .

Tiara: It Wasnt

Jermaine: BullShit , Whens the Last time you laughed ?

Tiara: Jermaine , Please Dont get on my nerves , its bad enough your here .

I look at her with my shocked White girl face , and reach my hands towards her slowly , she looks out the corner of her eye with this evil death stare , I started tickling her , and she did nothing , I wasnt about to give up that easy tho , I knew the way to her heart was making her laugh , If I could make her laugh then I could get her to talk to me . I Disastrously tickled her for minutes and not a one laugh or Peep out of her . I just looked at her and she looked at me like Nigga you Done and Rolled her eyes . Thats it , I forgot she was From the Hood , she like to argue , If I couldnt talk to her in a Civil Manor , Arguing with her would get my point across and her Juices Flowing , she like shit like that

Jermaine: Fuck it Then . I tried But Im not bout to kiss no Ass , Especially Not no Fat Pregnant Ass

Tiara: Excuse Me !

Jermaine: You Heard Me

Tiara: FUCK YOU

Jermaine: No Fuck you

Tiara: A Lie ! Cause you was too Busy Fucking Other Bitches

Jermaine: Fucking other Bitches ? You Running Your Mouth about something You Dont Know about .

Tiara: Something I dont Know about , Then How about you Enlighten Me Motherfucker

Jermaine: I been Trying to , But you aint wanna talk so Never Mind

Tiara: NOOOO You Brought it Up Now you gone talk Motherfucker . Talk

Jermaine; I mean what you want me to say Tiara

Tiara: Say What the Fuck you Did be a Man Nigga

Jermaine: be A Man , Ok I Got you , You Wanna Know what Happened ! I fucked Her There you Go

Tiara: YOU Dirty DOG

Jermaine; It Happened Once , She Was Just a random Girl , It was nothing More than Sex I payed for a Hotel We Fooled around and that was it , never talked to her again .

Tiara: ...............

Jermaine: Tiara *reaches for her *

Tiara: Dont Touch me *Snatches away*

Jermaine: Baby Im Sorry .

Tiara: Why Would you Do this , Why Now after 3 years Why Now ?

Jermaine: *Looks at her *

Tiara: Is it Because the babies

Jermaine: ........

Tiara: It is isnt it .. I knew it was a reason you didnt want to have sex anymore

Jermaine: Yea , But Its not what you think . I was Just Afraid to do it after the Doctors explain your Situation . I didnt wanna Hurt them, or you . I was Horny and She was right there just throwing it at me , and I Foolishly Caught it . She Was and Will be nothing more than A simple Fuck , I dont even Remember Her Name , I didnt take her out for dinner it was straight to the fucking and Bounce . I Know I fucked Up Big time , But I have regretted it every day since then . I havent been able to sleep Because of th Guilt I feel I feel like I let you down like i let them Down . Im Sorry Im Really Sorry .

Tiara: .............

Jermaine: Thats the Honest to God Truth . Im Not Bullshiting you , Its the Straight Up truth . Ima Be a Man about it and Tell you I fucked up , But Im also Man enough to Ask you Hell Beg you To forgive me , to give me a second Chance . Please Baby I love you And only You , Please .

Tiara: Can you go

Jermaine: Tiara Please

Tiara: Jermaine Please Just Go

Jermaine: Baby Im Sorry , Im On my Knees Please Dont Do this

Tiara: I Just need time to think Ok

Jermaine: ok , I'll give you that time , but Promise me you wont Leave

Tiara: Jermaine

Jermaine: Promise Me

Tiara: I Promise

I walked Over to her and Kissed her on the Forehead , I came Home With it set in my mind that I was coming home for good , But Honestly I couldnt blame her for Being mad with me , I Fucked up . I made a Mistake Like Most Niggas do , its Hard to Turn Down Pussy when Its constantly being threw your way , Especially when You havent had any in a Minute . This time I packed enough clothes to last a week , I made sure I got all my things I needed to take care Of business gave her a hug and Kiss and then Left . This By far was the hardest thing ive had to do , To Willingly hurt her , I could have done what I did in the past and Come up with a Full Proof Lie and More than Likely Pull it off , But that wasnt me anymore , I truly was sorry for what I did it haunted me every night , at least Now Its off my chest and hopefully we Can Move Past this , In Do time .


Kendrick's POV


After Being Stood Up by my Mom , I was Heart Broken . It was Like Ripping a band-aid Off , Off a Wound that Just Healed . my Biggest Fear Of getting to know my mother has came true . This was the very Exact reason I didnt want to get to know her . I had already Written her and my Father Off , I placed them into a Place of my mind that I would think of them again . Now for me to Tear those walls down and allow her back into my life only for this To happen again . It Hurt More the Second time around . In all Honesty Im Still shocked , I still Feel Like it didnt happen , that she was going to knock on that door and have a Decent Excuse as to why she Left me again . Leave me Devastated and Distraught just like she did 16 years ago . I couldnt Move , I just layed in my bed with tears occasionally falling down my face . I even Went so far as to Pray she Would Show up , It got to the Point that I Stopped , all those Ill will feelings I had towards her in the past started surfacing again . I was know Putting her back into a Place where Now she would never be able to come out of . As Of Now I would Never give her a second chance . Laid back Listening to My grandma's Gospel Music From her Room . When I hear the Door Bell Ring . It was like My heart skipped a Beat , I Quickly sat up and looked at my door ? It took me forever to get out the bed , What if it was her ? So be it , Maybe She has an Excuse , I dont care anymore , All these things ran through my mind as The Door Bell continued to ring . My Grandmother screamed from her room for me to get the Door . It felt like my legs weighed a ton as i walked towards the door . I walked down the stairs and i was More nervous than Ive Ever Been In my Life . I Opened the Door and Was meet with a Smile .

Cameron: what took You So Long

Kendrick: CAM , What are you doing here ?

Cameron: I came to see you

Kendrick: What ?

Cameron: Well I saw How hurt you were , And I just couldnt leave you like that , So when you went to sleep , I got on the First plane out here .

Kendrick: Im so Glad your Here .

All Of a sudden I started Crying , He wrapped his arms around me and Hugged me , It was Just Nice to have somebody there , and That wanted to be there . We Went up to My Room and Put his Bags Down .

Cameron: Are you Ok , Dont Lie to Me

Kendrick: No , Im Not

Cameron: Its Ok , Im here for you , Just tell me what you want me to do .

Kendrick: Theres Nothing to Do , Its over

Cameron: Dont talk like that

Kendrick: Dont talk like what ? She Decided not to show up , So therefore I Dont care anymore

Cameron: I dont Believe you , You Were So Happy to see her and spend time with her , I know all that Didnt Just go away that fast .

Kendrick: Im Not gonna Force somebody to Love me , If She dont care then Why should I

Cameron: you Dont know Exactly what Happened .

Kendrick: It Doesnt Matter at this Point

Cameron: yes it Does , Look we can Go Down to the Shelter and talk to her .

Kendrick: For What !

Cameron: Because , it has to be some reason she wouldnt show up , Dont you wanna Know ?

Kendrick: Actually No , I dont

Cameron: I get it Your Scared of being Hurt , and Letting her In again . I'll go with you

Kendrick: .........

Cameron: Come on , You can Do this , i'll be there every step of the way .

Kendrick: Why are you Pushing this ?

Cameron: because I dont think ive ever seen you that happy , Like you were Yesterday . So get up and lets go to that Shelter and talk to your Mom .

Kendrick: Ok Fine . i'll go

I get up and Get Dressed , I wasnt Really Sure what to Expect , But Hey If Cameron Came all the way out here to try and patch this back up , Who was I to Not Cooperate . We Got In his Car and Headed Down to the Shelter I was Nervous up until we got there , once we got there It was like this Numb feeling like whatever it was she had to say It really didnt matter anymore It was clear as day to me that I had somebody who would be there for me no Matter what and I was thankful for him . We walked int other Shelter and Looked around for somebody that was in charged . We asked a young girl and she told us to look for Sister Potter .

Kendrick: Excuse me are you sister Potter ?

Sis Potter: Yes , how Can I help you

Kendrick: Well Im looking for my mother

Sis Potter: Can you Be more Specific ?

Kendrick: Her Name Is Juanita .....

Sis Potter: Your her Son ,

Kendrick: Yes Mam

Sis Potter: And you Dont Know where she Is ?

Kendrick: the Last time I saw her , she was leaving heading back here

SIs potter: She Never Showed up Lastnight

Kendrick: What ?

Sis Potter: We Havent seen her since she left to meet you

Kendrick: Well maybe she Went to Rehab

Sis Potter: I doubt that the van transporting them to Rehab Left Hours ago .

Kendrick: Wait so she isnt here or Rehab ?

Sis Potter: Sorry , But I think I might Know where to find her . Come with me you Need to tell me everything that Happened the last time you saw her .

We Followed Sis Potter to the Van and Drove off with her , I told her Every thing , Every last detail I could think of .

Sis Potter; You Should have never Done that ,

Kendrick: Im sorry I didnt know

Sis Potter: 20 dollars is entirely to much for an Addict

Cameron: Do you have an Idea of where she could Be

Sis Potter; I have a strong Idea , But Hopefully she isnt here . I had such High Hopes for her

About Five Minutes later We pull up at this Big Old House , It looked abandon and Immediately I knew what it was , It was a Crack house , Sis Potter Showed her Parole Badge and they Scattered Like roaches , We Entered the House and All I can Do was Hold back tears , And Pray that she wasnt in here . We took a look around and non of the People in the house was my Mom .

Sis Potter: Jaunita ,, Nita

Kendrick: MOM

Sis Potter: She's Not in here , Lets Check out Back .

We Exit back out the Front Door , and I Before I walked out the Door , a Man Grabbed my arm .

Man: You Look Just them

Kendrick: Excuse Me ?

Man: Ken and Juanita Your the Spitting Image of them

Kendrick: You Knew My parents?

Man: We were like Family , as Close to family as you can get in this life

Kendrick: Have you Seen her

Man: She was around Last night ,

Kendrick: Is She ... Did She ....

Man; *shakes his head Yes*

Kendrick: *Hangs his Head Low*

Man: Hey Kid , Your Mother a Strong Woman , She's been doing this for a long time , She's Gonna be ok . She talks about you all the time ya know

Kendrick: thank you , I gotta go .

I walk out the House and Bump into Cam , he has this Look on his face like Something was Wrong .

Cameron: Lets Go

Kendrick: Ok , Was she Back there

Cameron: uhhhh No , lets just get in the van and wait on Sister Potter

Kendrick: Whats wrong , why are you acting weird

Cameron: Lets just go

Kendrick: Cam

Cameron: .......

Kendrick: She's back there isnt she ?

Cameron:....

Kendrick: Isnt she !

Cameron: Ken

Kendrick: Move

Cameron: You Dont wanna go back there

Kendrick: Move !

I Push past him and he tries to grab my arm , but I yank away from him and Jump off the Porch and Run to the Back , When I see Sister pat standing there On the Phone , She looks up at me like a Deer Caught in Headlights and I turn and look at Cameron and From the Looks on their faces , I automatically knew It wasnt Good , But I had to see it for myself , I walked closer and I could see her Feet and her jacket , I got closer and my eyes traced up from her legs all the way to her face , and my Worst fear had Came True , She was Dead , He mouth was open with this Dried up White Residue on her face around her mouth , And a Needled Still dangling out her arm . I dropped to my knees and it felt like the air was draining from my body . I reached out and touched her leg and squeezed it . I called her Name over and over , and I felt ms potter place her hand on my shoulder . I snatched the needle out her arm and wrapped my arms around her , He body limp and almost stiff just draped across my shoulder , I hugged her tight , Holding on for dear life with tears pouring down my face . I tried to keep it in , But I couldnt I just start screaming Why! WHY ! NO! . Cameron Sat Next to me and Grabbed my Hand , I looked up at him and could see the hurt on his face too . Moments later I heard the Siren and the EMT's Literally had to pry her from my grip . Cameron Picked me up and carried me to the van and Placed me in it . Words couldnt explain the Pain and Hurt I felt . It was like Pure Guilt . It was my Fault and I knew it . After Everything Happened I ended up on the couch with Cams arms around me and a Glass of Mascato .

Cameron: you Ok ?

Kendrick: Its my Fault isnt It ?

Cameron: No

Kendrick: I gave her the 20 dollars , I gave her the Money that she used to get high . How is it not my fault

Cameron: You Didnt Pump that Into her , she did .

Kendrick: Because Of me

Cameron: because She Wanted to , Because there was something wrong with her , It had nothing to do with you .

Kendrick: No matter what you say im still guilty , Im SO STUPID

Cameron: No , Im Not about to sit here and let you blame yourself , For Her Problems .

Kendrick: I should have known not to give her the Money . She was On track and ready to change her life , and I Went and Handed an Addict Money . What Was I thinking ?

Cameron: Do you want me to say its your fault

Kendrick: I want you to tell me the Truth .

Cameron: The Money you gave her She Used it to Buy drugs and then Over Dosed . You gave her the Money , But she Chose to Buy the Drugs she chose to Shoot up . Not You . So Dont blame yourself .

Kendrick: I Just wanna go to Bed .

Cameron: Me too , Lets go

We Went up to my grandma Room to check on her , She Was surprisingly Ok , She said something about being relieved . And that she no longer had to worry about that Phone Call anymore or the police man knocking on the door . We went into my room and laid down .

Cameron: Kendrick

Kendrick: Huh

Cameron: You Sleep ?

Kendrick: Almost

Cameron: Do you think your Efficiency apartment can Hold 73 pair Of J's

Kendrick: Huh ... Wait What ?

Cameron: Do you think theres enough room for the Both of us

Kendrick: *sits up and bed * are you Forreal ?

Cameron: Yep

Kendrick; You Wanna Move to D.C ?

Cameron: I want to be with you , and If D.C is where you at then thats where i wanna Be

Kendrick: *starts Crying*

Cameron: Why are you Crying ?

Kendrick: No There Happy tears this time .

Cameron: oh I was bout to say , Damn If you dont want me to come I wont lol

Kendrick: Shut up , You know I want you to come .

Cameron: I cant wait to come , But you gotta give me 2 weeks to tie everything up back at home , and then im all yours

Kendrick: Deal , Two Weeks . Shake on it

Cameron: Kiss on it .

I lean in and Start kissing him , I dont know if its behind all the Random emotions flowing through me at the same time , but this kiss felt Powerful , almost Mind Blowing . In Two Weeks I will Be living My Dude , This was Definitely going to take the Death of my Mother Off my mind for a While . That night I feel asleep in Cameron's arms .