Merlin imagines

Arthur- still

I watch from above as the love of my life kneels at my grave, pain on his face. He places a single flower, a white orchid, by the stone engraved with my name.
"I could have saved you," he whispers his voice breaking the sound of leaves rustling, a single tear streaming down his right cheek. "I should of have done something." The pain causing his voice to crack also causes my heart to break along with his. I cannot describe how much it longs to answer back, to tell him that it was no ones fault but my own. However how much I try my voice has been taken away along with the privilege of life.
My hands long to push back his sandy hair, to run my fingers through it. To feel his heartbeat under my fingers as we breathe in sync. I cannot help but wish for my hands to caress his face, to take in every detail, that I took for granted.
"I cannot run the kingdom without you," his voice is filled with despair and it breaks my heart to hear him this way. "I cannot live without you." He adds softly another tear falls but from the other eye this time round. I wish nothing more to brush it away with the pad of my thumb but I draw back, hating how much it hurts knowing I can never do it again.
"I cannot believe it has been a whole year since I lost you." He looks up at the sky biting his lip, trying to hide the blatant pain on his face. "It hurts like it was yesterday." He whispers his eyes falling back on my grave. My throat closes up and if my eyes could produce tears they would be flooded with them.
"I remember like it was yesterday," a look of grief overcomes his face too painful for me to bear to look at.
FLASHBACK
"Come on Arthur!" I groan as we ride the horses out of the castle grounds. He laughs behind me the sound filling both of us with joy. He rides up beside m grinning with joy.
"I will race you to the stream." He challenges and I laugh accepting it. I gently kick my horse into gear and we gallop across the quiet woods. I can hear him laughing from behind me and I smile at the sound I have grown to love.
Suddenly and without warning an arrow whizzes through the air and plants itself deeply into my chest. Blood curdles into my throat as I fall backwards off my horse. The chestnut beauty rides off without me as my body hits the ground hard and painfully. The world starts to spin as Arthur's face hovers over my own. My bottom lip quivers as the pain numbs and my heart rate starts to slow.
"You are okay," he whispers stroking my forehead, his hands shaking. "You are fine." He nods to himself as tears form in my eyes. "Does it hurt?" He whispers and I shake my head the tears falling.
"No." I whisper and he nods pressing his wet lips to my forehead. "It doesn't hurt because you are here." I finish as blood trickles out my mouth.
"I will not leave." He gulps out.
"Be a good King, Arthur." I raise a hand and stroke his cheek.
"I cannot, not without you." Despair fills his voice.
"You can." I look into his eyes. "You can, because I know you can and because I believe in you and I love you." I pant out and tears slip down his cheeks.
"I love you too." He presses a hard, long kiss to my lips and moments later I feel the life leave me.
FLASHBACK END
"I still love you." He whispers looking at my name on the grave. I want nothing more to whisper back "I still love you too," and it hurts that I cannot.
"I hope you know everything I do for Camelot is for you." My heart contracts as he places a hand on my grave. "I hope you still believe in me." With that he stands, walking away from my grave, new tears on his cheeks.
"I still believe in you Arthur." I think as I watch his back fade away into the dos made. "I never stopped."

A/n guysssssss thanks so much for the 1k views!!! I just wrote this to get out some of my feelings about Merlin and now I have 1k views! That's amazing! Thanks to all my loyal readers. I love each and every one of you x