✨L I F E G O E S O N✨

❤️Kazuko❤️

17th September 2012

Chaeyoung: I heard that should be really good.

Yejin: I was there once with my mother. I love it. The atmosphere there is so nice. It's really good. And the food is delicious there.

Jihe: Wow. I am a bit jealous. Maybe we want to go there together?

Yejin: Good idea. I would like to go again.

Chaeyoung: Suri? What about you? Are you coming?

Me: No. Sorry. I already have something to do.

Chaeyoung: Oh come on. You are never there. Please come with us. Please?

Me: Sorry.

Jihe: Next time then.

I'm at school. I'm sitting in the cafeteria with Jihe, Chaeyoung and Yejin. A new café in town is supposed to have opened a few days ago and a lot people are saying it is pretty good. To be honest, I don't like public places. I haven't had bad experiences with places like this, I just don't like them. I'm also on diet. But the idea of ​​doing something with friends is really nice. However, I don't have any. Chaeyoung, Yejin, and Jihe are really nice. But we only see each other at school. And only talk during the breaks. Who knows who they really are like. But I don't even want to know. Because as nice classmates they are enough for me. It's nice not to feel so alone during the breaks. I met them as I went up a class. Chaeyoung came straight to me. She spoke to me and since then we've always been together in the breaks to talk and eat. Apart from that, the last few days have been very stressful for me. I had some problems with a shoot and during vocal training. Because suddenly I was trained not only in rap but also in singing. And I don't need difficulties now. I have a big audition on Friday. Everything I have done up to then will be evaluated and Pdnim will also sit in the room.
In short, this audition decides whether I can debut with the others. To be honest, I'm very nervous. What if I can't do it? I've worked hard for it. I've learned a lot. I can do it. But it's Monday now. So until then I'll try to give my best. I will always do my best.

Jihe: Suri? Are you coming? We have to go back to class. Otherwise we'll be late.

Me: I'm coming.

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Finally, the school day is over for today. I hate mondays. Not because they are at the beginning of the week, but because I have a lot of subjects and courses that day that I hate. Fortunately, I don't have lessons with Jae anymore. He's annoying.
I'm waiting for my bus right now. From the bus stop you can see a playground. It's fenced in so that the children don't run out to the street. The children who play there seem to be happy. They look very young. 2 or 3 years old. Older children probably already have a hobby. Golf or something because of their parents. Seoul is not only the capital of South Korea, it is also a city that makes people successful. Failure is never good in this society. All must be good. No. You have to be perfect. You have to be the best. But it's like that everywhere in Korea. Children who die here because of suicide are forgotten. Because it has become normal. Only that person's parents will remember. And that's bad. Because actually you should remember each and every one of them. Because they were all good people for sure. A woman who lost her husband is called widow. A man who lost his wife is called widower. A kid who lost it's parents is called orphan. But there is no word for a parent who lost the own child. You know why?
I don't know either. Maybe it's because there is no word in this world that cloud describe the excruciating pain. Even I can't imagine how these parents must feel. On the other side of the street is a travel agency and 2 learning centers. There are tons of such institutes here. I estimate more than 20. Most of these are strung together. Other students take private lessons. Especially in the evening you can see how many parents drive their children to additional lessons or pick them up later in the night. This city never sleeps. It was the same in Busan. But if something got too much, I could go to the beach. Noone cares how the other is doing. Everyone takes care of themselves. Finding a real friend in this society is difficult. If you are lucky you have the right people around you. But sometimes you can't even trust your parents. Children who have difficulties with this school system or who even leave school early disappoint their parents and are rejected by them.
Finally, the bus arrived and I got in. I put on my on-ear headphones. I hear "Tell Me Goodbye" by Bigbang and "Stand by Me" by Shinee. I love Shinee's music. When I talked to Jonghyun, he said that "Lucifer" was his favorite song. He even gave me his number. However, I haven't texted him yet. Maybe I'll do that when I have less stress. As soon as I arrived infront of the building called BigHit I went directly to dance room. But then one of the staff stops me. He told me that 1 girl will arrive later. She is trainee. She comes from Gwangju. And she is 11 years old. I should bring her in the dorm that I share with Areum and Maya.

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In the evening I got the girl. I do not know her name. When I went to get her, she smiles at me. She is cute. She wears a black pullover, which almost goes to her knee, and she wears a black tight jeans and black shoes.

Me: hey sweetie. Are You The New Trainee?

??: *nod*

She seems very shy. She doesn't talk as much as Areum and Maya when I met them. She also had barley eye contact. She looks either on the ground or pass me. But still she makes a friendly impression.

Me: Okay. Call me Suri. What's your name?

??: Kazuko. Tanaka Kazuko.

Oh my God the way says talks. So sweet. She seems so Innocent.

Me: Wow. Nice name. It is a Japanese name right?

Kazuko: Yes. My parents both came from Japan.

She seems pretty much proud of it.

Me: Okay great. Do you want to go home? We will share a room. Do you have your skedule?

Kazuko: Yes, I have. How many are we actually?

Me: We are 4 girls. Let's Go?

Kazuko: Let's Go.

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Areum: Who is that?

Me: Kazuko ... that's Maya and Areum. Areum, Maya .... That's Kazuko. She is now trainee here.

Maya: Hey. Welcome home. And by the way beautiful name.

Kazuko: Thank You.

Areum: Why are you here? Why don't you live with others?

I was shocked. Maya was also shocked. Kazuko looks only on the floor.

Me: Areum? What's wrong with you? Where is your respect? She did nothing wrong. She has a right here to be just like you. And only to your information, you are younger than her. You should have more respect for elders.

Then she went away. Maya said that she will talk to her, then she wished us a good night. When she went to Areum, Kazuko and I were alone.

Me: Don't mind Areum. She will surely apologize soon. Don't take it seriously. And now come with me. I'll show you our bedroom.

She nodded and followed me. When I showed her our bedroom, she was fascinated. She has been looking around and had a small smile on her thin lips.

Me: Do you like it here?

Kazuko: Yes.

Me: Feel like you're home. You live here since now.

Kazuko nodded and smiled.

Kazuko: Suri?

Me: Hmm?

Kazuko: Can you show me where the bathroom is? I'm tired. I want to go to sleep ...

Me: Sure.

The rest of the evening was quiet.