BTS Angsts

Jung Hoseok - Alive (Pt.2)

<Hoseok's Pov>
Once we got back to the dorm, I locked myself in my room. I had to share a room with Jimin but I'm pretty sure he's off in the dance studio or chasing around Jungkook. I lay on my bed and re-read the letter (Y/N) had given me. I couldn't help but smile at the thought that she would call me. Or would she? Did she just give me these gifts as a joke? Does she know that I have depression and anxiety? Was she just playing when she called me her bias? These thoughts swirled in my head as I felt my anxiety kicking in. My heart races and my palms began to sweat. I felt as though I was going to have a panic attack. "Taehyung!" I wheezed as I felt my throat closing up. "Taehyung!!! Taehyung!" My chest felt tight as the door finally burst open. Taehyung rushed in and sat me upright to try and calm me down (A/N: AYO VHOPE SAILING LOL). After about 5 minutes I had started to calm down and Taehyung had gone out to buy my medicine from the chemist as I had forgotten that I had run out. I waited patiently for Taehyung but then me phone rang. My heart jumped as I saw the contact name. It was (Y/N). I cleared my throat before answering the phone in my calmest voice. "Hello (Y/N)." I said. "Hi Hoseok, how are you?" She asked politely. A smile crept up my face. Her voice was so unique in many different ways, yet it made me feel something deep down in my heart. I continued talking with (Y/N) for 20 minutes. We got to know each other within that time and we laughed about almost everything. She had the most beautiful laugh and her giggles were music to my ears. "So when will I see you again?" She asked anxiously. "Uhm we can meet up later today if you're not busy." I replied. "Alright. Do you want to go to the coffee shop near the library?" I considered this for a moment as I didn't really like coffee, but I agreed anyway. At least I would see (Y/N). "Okay Hoseok, I'll see you later." She said. "Bye (Y/N)!" I replied enthusiastically before ending the call and jumping in the shower to get ready to see (Y/N).

~At the coffee shop~ 
(Y/N) had arrived at the coffee shop before me and I had spotted her in the corner wearing denim shorts and a nice pink t-shirt. She stood up and hugged me as I got closer to her. I felt....safe? I didn't know how to explain my feelings but I just went with the flow and sat at the table with (Y/N). We talked and talked and talked and talked. I went through 3 glasses of iced coffee and (Y/N) drank a couple cups of water. I didn't know how much time had passed but it seemed like it flew past because the coffee shop had cleared out. My conversation with (Y/N) had settled down and it seemed as though we had known every single thing about each other. I knew (Y/N) was my source of happiness, she gave me a sense of purpose. It was the first time in 4 years that I had felt this happy and I love how I'm feeling. "Hoseok-ah can I ask you a personal question?" (Y/N)'s voice flicks me back into reality and I gesture for her to ask whatever she pleases. "There have been rumours that you have anxiety and depression, is that true?" Her question hits me by surprise but I answer her as best as I can. "Well, so to say the rumours are true. I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety 4 years ago which was a year before I debuted with Bangtan." (Y/N) nodded along and I could tell that she felt for me. There was an awkward silence between us that made me feel insecure, but (Y/N) spoke up once more. "Just know that I'll always be here for you." She said. I smiled at her happily knowing that she actually cared. The coffee shop was packing up as it was time to close. I payed for our drinks and walked (Y/N) to her car. "It was nice meeting with you Hoseok. We should..." I finished her sentence: "do it again sometime?" She giggled and nodded eagerly. I hugged her tightly and when we pulled away we stared into each others eyes just like we did at the fan meet. I didn't know what struck me but I leant in and gave (Y/N) a light kiss. She was surprised at first but her body relaxed once we pulled away. I could tell it was her first kiss as she was blushing really hard. I laughed and hugged her once more before letting her get in her car. "Bye (Y/N)." I said as she started the engine. "Bye Hoseok!" She responded before rolling the window back up and driving away. I walked back to the dorm and went to my room. "Hoseok where were you? Dinner was already served!" Taehyung exclaimed as he barged through the door. "I already had a meal." I said. "With who?" He asked curiously.

"The love of my life."