Persphyni: I am Determined

19

"Son of a bitch!" The aggravated hiss filled the air as small sparks chased after my fingers. I dropped the wires and shook my hands trying to alleviate the pinch of pain.

I scrunched my fingers into a fist then released as I got ready to try again. I took a moment to shake out. I jumped a little and shook out my arms as I prepared to get these two wires connected.

I steeled my face and approached the panel wires with determination. I gave myself extra room between the two ends to try and avoid being fried. I wasn't sure how the wires had enough energy to spark but I didn't care if it meant I got the first panel on.

I was using one of the damaged panels as a guide to connect the good panel to the Rover. Once I did one, I was certain I could replicate it to do the other three. However, this first wire was taking more time than I anticipated.

"Okay." I mumbled as I bring the two wire ends together. Once the exposed metal was touching, I began to twist and create a coiled-seal. Using the old connector, I wrapped the wires to keep them together. When I pulled my hands back and looked over at the old panel to compare, I laughed in relief. I'd done it.

"One down, eleven more to go." I turned and walked to my backpack where the metal canteen laid on top. I swooped down on the canteen and then ended up dropping it as soon as I grabbed it. My arm tensed as the shock ran up my fingertips and traveled up to my wrist.

And this is when I would have expected some sort of electric joke, but instead I just grit my teeth and head back to the Rover.

"Stupid science."

______•*•*•*•______

By the time I had replaced the second panel, the sun was high in the sky and beating down on the small dead forest. The temperature wasn't as sweltering as the sand dunes. The forest terrain kept the heat from just sticking and radiating back up directly from the ground. But it still pounded against my bare shoulders as I worked on the Rover. The last two panels were spread out ready to go when I took a short water and snack break.

I was impressed with the fact I managed to get the two panels on one side completely done within eight hours. However when I remembered that Sinclair and Raven had all four done in two hours, I couldn't help but laugh at the scenario.

"This certainly is something you won't see ever again." I hoped saying it out loud would make it true. But only time would tell.

I sat up in the back of the Rover and hung my legs over the side. I looked at my bare arms before looking down at my torso where seven short marks made a picture with the stab wounds and bullet holes. My left hand subconsciously traveled to my back where I felt raised lines and shallow marks in my skin. Then moved to the small pointed indents from a panther's claws sat in an arc on either shoulder.

My scars were works of art and medals of history. They were the images authors tried to write down and explain. Like the stars above, they each had a story.

My right hand drifted to the left side of my neck, just below my jawline where a thin white line softly marked the skin.

"Is that all you got." I still hadn't flinched, I hadn't screamed or winced. Biting them all down as I stood tall in front of them.

Clank!

Clank!

"Enough! Pers, please! Move!" I didn't look at her, to busy staring into brown eyes.

Clank!

Clank!

This time he hit me higher, one on my collarbone where the black leather jacket added padding but would leave a bruise. The second, skimmed my neck, just below my jaw. Drawing a light line of blood.

Seven hits, and I was still standing.

It is odd to think that about two years ago I had hated him. With a burning passion. He was rude. He was an asshole.

But now. Now I think that burning passion has been utilized for something other than hate.

I once read, "there is a thin line between love and hate", I think I crossed that line blindly the day the grounders attacked. Maybe even sooner.

I dug through my backpack and found the small container I had of preservable food. The only thing left being the nuts I had seen the grounders eat and use for meals. I hadn't broken into the container yet as I made sure to keep my rations in order of preservation-ability. It's the only reason I picked them in the first place. And no they weren't Jobi nuts.

I grabbed a handful and tossed them in my mouth. The action drew another memory.

"Then I guess you're going to have to teach me as well." I ate one last nut before setting the bag down and grabbing a rifle from the stack.

"Finally. Something you aren't good at." Clarke said giving me a small nudge.

"Who said I wasn't good?" I walked to stand between them and raised the gun to my right shoulder and aimed at the target, finger outside of the trigger as I stared down the scope.

"A little higher." Because of how we're standing, Bellamy's front was pressed to my back as he leaned in to adjust my grip. My eyes wide as his other hand grabbed my left hip and pulled it back to make my stance more balanced. Then his right hand drifted from my shoulder and the butt of the gun to my elbow and raised it slightly.

"Uh, Shadow, you okay?" I could hear the smirk in his voice. Oh I wanted to drop the gun and punch him right now. But that wouldn't help anyone. I clicked the safety off before looking back through my scope, clearing my mind as I blocked Clarke's laughter and stared at the blanket.

Bang!

The bullet had made a hole right in the middle of one of the lines that made the 'x'. Roughly a few inches from the center but still good none the less.

"Clarke, your turn." I breathed.

Oh what a time. Yeah, I think I crossed the line blindly before I even realized it.