Our Dance: Shawn Mendes ✔️

75

Lila Hamilton
-Three days later

I've continued to meet Alex for the past days and he just doesn't seem to be getting the hint. Even when I continuously mention Shawn and the fact I have a baby. He doesn't get it.

And because of this i decided to take Haven with me to work just to put it out there even more. Shawn even suggested that he come too for a little bit but he had to meet with Andrew last minute, so here I was with a fussy Haven in my arms as I tried to make note of all the things Alex was saying.

"-so the people who do the floors will be here tomorrow afternoon, the mirrors will also be installed-"

Haven wails loudly, his tiny fists going to his sore eyes. "Sorry" i mumble, I put my paper and pen down to cradle Haven properly but he wasn't calming down at all.

"Come on Havey, what is it?" I softly sway him, rubbing over his damp chubby cheeks with my thumb. It pained me seeing him like this.

"Maybe we should call it a day" Alex suggests. I shake my head no, "he's probably just hungry or something. Erm carry on, please" I tell him.

He nods, sighing sympathetically. "Curtains are ready to be installed, the back rooms will be done by next week— Lila" he cuts himself off facing me. "Maybe you should take him to the doctors"

My eyes go back down to haven. He looked so poorly and it was breaking my heart.

"Yeah, I'm so sorry-"

His hands go to my shoulders, "Hey stop apologising, it's fine. I can drive if you want so you can sit with him" he squeezes my body a little.

"If it's not a hassle-"

"It's nothing, come on" he smiles down at me.
-

Alex didn't take me to the hospital, instead we went home. I didn't want to see my baby in the hospital at all, so I decided to just take him home and get him comfy with all his favourite things.

I was sat on the sofa with my legs up and crossed, Haven fidgeting in my arms as I fed him but he seemed so uncomfortable so I pull him away gently, adjusting my top up then I lay him on my chest, rubbing his small back in hopes my baby would feel better.

"Your tea" Alex walks in with two cups, he places them on the table then sits beside me, a little close but I brushed it off since I was more focused on getting Haven to feel better.

Also, Shawn wasn't home. I texted him about haven three times and he didn't respond which is fine, I got this.

"Is he okay?" Alex asks softly. I shake my head no, "I think he's tired. He's barely slept" I sigh, I felt like a shitty mother to be honest. I've not been home the last three days and now my son is not well. I should've been here to look after him.

"His eyes are starting to flutter" Alex whispers. "They are?" I ask surprised. Haven makes the most cutest little noise, sniffling as he snuggles further into my neck. "My poor baby" I kiss his small head as I continue rubbing his back.

-

I don't know where the time had gone but I was being woken up, my body being nudged and my name being called repeatedly.

"Hmm?" I mumble lazily, inching closer to the warm body next to me. Realisation hits me.

I open my eyes and I find myself leaned into Alex's side, my head resting on his shoulder as he had one arm around me and I held a sleeping haven in my arms.

Then there stood Shawn, hands on hips, an annoyed expression on his face.

I lift my head up, my heart rate increasing as I look up at Shawn, I know I did nothing wrong but to him, I can't imagine what this looked like.

"I'll go put him down" I whisper getting up with haven in my arms. Shawn nods moving out the way. "Are we going to talk?" He asks following me to the nursery.

"If you want to"

"Yeah, I want to talk" he says firmly. I gulp putting haven down carefully. I tuck him in and turn the monitor on then I face Shawn, he was looking down at me angrily.

"What the fuck was that?" He spits, crossing his bulging arms over his chest. "Not here" I shake my head at him, slipping past him to walk out the door and to our room.

He was following hot on my heels, the door shuts and I sit at the edge of the bed looking up at him.

I knew he wasn't happy. Of course he wasn't happy but I did nothing wrong and I hoped he'd see that.

"Shawn, just let me talk? Please" I ask softly. "Talk?" He scoffs. "Lila, I came home to see you cozied up to some random guy, asleep in my home with my baby in your arms! Do you know how that looks?" His tone harsh and his voice getting louder.

"Stop yelling at me-"

"I'll yell all I want" He scoffs. "I didn't do anything wrong-"

"Yeah clearly, why was he even here? Why were you basically hugging him in your sleep? Why is he looking after my son?" I flinch at his booming voice and how he was inching towards me.

"He's my son too"

"Is that all you have to say?" He asks annoyed.

I gulp getting up, to be level with him but he was towering over me and I could feel the frustration radiating off of him.

"I didn't do anything wrong-"

"You were-"

"Let me talk" I stop him calmly. "Haven wasn't feeling well and Alex offered to take me home. That's all. He asked so I could sit with Haven and keep him calm because he's not well. We got home and I was struggling with haven so he stayed and tried to help me. I didn't mean to fall asleep like that, it was harmless. I did nothing wrong and it hurts that you don't believe me" I try my best to explain.

"I don't like him Lila!" Shawn exclaims, right in my face. "He's been getting close to you and you know it, how're you so blind to the fact he clearly likes you?"

"Because I have you" I throw my arms up in frustration. "And because of that I don't look at anybody else. Plus I've told him that I have you and he understands that and he's apologised-"

"Why're you on his side? He likes you Lila! And he's probably just said that to be kind about it but he still likes you-"

"He's helping me with work!"

"Oh yeah" he rolls his eyes and it infuriates me. "When you go off for hours and then come home all tired? When I stay here and look after haven. No wonder you don't know what to do with him now that he's ill"

I felt rage run through my veins but an overpowering feeling of hurt was stronger.

I step back nodding in defeat, I turn around ready to walk away but he pulls me back so I'm right in front of him.

"You have nothing to say?"

I shake my head no and move out of his grip to leave the room, I shut the door behind me quietly and go to the living room. Alex was gone and a note was in his place saying he had to go.

I take a deep breath and keep in all the emotions of anger, hurt and sadness and I go to the kitchen to busy myself.