CHAPTER 5: DEAL

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It felt like forever waiting for Sam to speak

Her silence was drowning me

Then, when I was about to lose hope in her confiding in me.

Thinking that today would be one of those days of playing pretend

She finally spoke, and I was so happy my tears almost fell

(she sighed deeply before she looked at me)

S: what do u want to know Mon?

M: What were u thinking that day Sam?

Why did u try to kill yourself?

(She closed her eyes and with bated breath, I waited again. praying to God that she doesn't change her mind again
That she won't push me out again
I need Sam to talk to me
I am so desperate right now!
Please Sam!!!)

S: I was hoping if we don't talk about it, it would become less real Mon

Can't we keep it that way?

M: U know we have to talk about this Sam

We can't just pretend that it never happened

Until when are we going to walk on eggshells around each other Sam?

it doesn't and cannot work like this Sam!

We both know that we have to fix this!

We need to fix us!

We're both broken Sam

We need to get this off our chest for at least a chance to let ourselves heal and move on toward a better tomorrow Sam

We deserve to be happy too

S: Mon... (she sighed again. Obviously contemplating.
She closed her eyes and took deeper breaths before she looked at me again)
before we talk about me
Can we talk about u first?

M: me? What about me do u want to know Sam?

S: Are u ever going to tell me what happened that night?

M: That night? which night Sam?

S: I meant THAT NIGHT Mon
There's really ever only one night that I could be referring to Mon
Please don't play dumb with me
U know it would never work

M: ooohhh u meant that night
Hmmm... I don't know where to start Sam

S: Start anywhere
please at least start somewhere Mon
I don't really care how u say it
Just please
I really need your answers as much as u need mine

M: you really know how to make it even huh?

S: have u forgotten who I am Mon?
(She followed it with a smirk.
I really loved her smirk. She looks so arrogant yet somehow it drives me crazy. She looks so Hot!)

M: How can I forget the one and only Lady Samanan Anantrakul?

(She smiled at that.
A genuine smile this time, which in turn also made me smile.
I missed this.
Us being happy
I miss seeing Sam so carefree, just chatting and joking around with me

I promise.

Sam, I will get u the help that u need to get better

I really need my ChamCham back)

S: no more delays Mon
I've waited long enough
Don't u think so?

M: hmmm... you are right Sam u did.
Thank u and I love u ChamCham soooo much!
U are all I need!

S: I love u too MonMon!
Now quit stalling!

M: hey! I wasn't stalling!
I really just wanted to say I love u coz I really do

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