Falling for Mr. Right

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(Bookworms Community Reviews) 

Author: @DaydreamCreator

Chapters: 3 chapters

Genre: Romance

Specific: Everything


Cover-

I always review the cover last because I try not to judge a book by its cover.

The image lets the readers know what the story is about, although I have seen a lot of erotic books on Wattpad with the same idea. There's nothing wrong with the cover at all, but a suggestion would be to try and think outside the box. Instead of having two people kissing against the wall, use other images like handcuffs or red silk. Again, just my opinion.

I understand your title because Right is Max's surname, but the title in itself is quite a cliché on Wattpad. Again, this is my opinion, but it's something to think about.


Blurb-

The blurb can be written in 3rd person or 1st, but usually, 3rd person is prefered.

Your blurb is good, but a suggestion would be to stick with just one person point of view and not both of the characters for the blurb.

This is why it's good to write the blurb in 3rd person, so you can talk about both characters.

"I was never supposed to fall for..." is repetitive.

Another point to add is that your blurb is written in the past tense and the present, and it should be written in the present tense only. It doesn't matter if you write the rest of the book in the past, the blurb should be in the present.

Your example...

"I was never supposed to fall for Max Right. But who am I kidding, I knew there was a chance of this after crushing on him since I was fifteen. Now that his ex has walked back into his life and everything else is falling apart around me, I feel more lost than ever. Can I tell Max how I really feel, and if I do, will he feel the same?"

I was never supposed to want Lexi Hail and now she's all I can think about. The moment I saw her at the wedding I was a goner, and now I've crossed the line by having sex with her. If I get caught fooling around with her it may blow up in all our faces. But with her curvy body and witty mouth, I can't seem to stay away. Can I get away with doing this without hurting everyone around me?"

A similar suggestion could...

"Lexi Hail falls for Max Right, but his ex walks straight back into his life after she broke his heart. Everything falls apart for Lexi as she feels more lost now than ever. Is she able to confess to Max her true feelings, and will he feel the same?

After one passionate night of sex, Max finds himself with Lexi in more ways than one, different from his previous relationships. With her curvy body and her witty mouth, can Max stay away and keep away for good? Is he able to do this without hurting everybody around him, or will there be dire consequences for his actions?"

You don't have to use this suggestion as it's not perfect, but it gives an idea of the layout and what people might expect.

Note- I wrote this before reading the chapters, so it's not going to be right. I don't really know if his ex broke his heart, just presuming.

By writing in 3rd person, you can capture both ends of the characters.


Grammar-

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