Chloe's Book Reviews {CLOSED/ HIATUS}

Battle of Retention

* This review may contain spoilers * 

Username: glitter_xxxlicious 

Genre: Fantasy 

Chapters: 5 chapters

Specific: Vocabulary, descriptions and dialogue 

Book

Cover - 

The cover has that anime feel from the woman on the cover. It also matches the same vibe from the various images and character aesthetics in the book. But it's beautiful in its own way. I think "Battle" could have been written in the same colour brightness for it to stand out against the background. It sort of fades out a little. 

Blurb -

I do like your blurb and you've made it sound interesting, especially when you introduce all the entities surrounding the book. 

I have read that it's best for a blurb to be written in the present tense. Feel free to take up on my suggestions, if not, please ignore them. You switch between both tenses, so it's best to be consistent, favouring the present tense for the blurb.

Here are segments of your blurb...

"Demons, a merciless, atrocious, most despised species inhabiting the Earth, once dominated over humans for centuries. Their sadistic actions continued to bring incessant anguish for humans; until the servants of God- the Angels set their foot on Earth. As the catastrophic battle between the two might opponents ended, so did the reign of the Demon empire." 

A suggestion could be...

{"Demons, a merciless, atrocious, most despised species inhabits the Earth, once dominating humans for centuries.  Their sadistic actions continue to bring incessant anguish to humans. Until the servants of God -- the angels, set foot on Earth. As the catastrophic battle between the two mighty opponents end, so does the reign of the demon empire."} 

Your example...

"The Demons disappeared for good, only to give birth to evil within the good. Thus, began the second battle of retention in modern society. This time, however, a third was involved- now more powerful than ever before."

A suggestion could be...

{"As the demons disappear for good, only to give birth to evil within, begins the second battle of retention in modern society. This time; however, a third entity is involved. One that is much more powerful than before. "} 

Your example...

"Evil lurked around everywhere. while the good hid in silence. To put the distress to a permanent stop, an apathetic Demon and a congenial Angel joins hands to bring peace on Earth while concealing their identities from one another." 

A suggestion could be...

["Evil lurks around every corner, while the good hide in silence. To put the distress to a permanent stop, an apathetic demon and a congenial angel join hands to bring peace on Earth as they conceal their identities from one another."} 

Grammar - 

(Chapter One)