A Thousand Details

82 10 4
                                    

(Bookworms Community Reviews) 

Author: @meganwatkins101

Chapters: 3 chapters (Including Prologue) 

Genre: Romance/ Young Adult

Specific: Everything


Cover-

The cover is cute and simple. I wouldn't say it's eye-catching, but it does fit the genre perfectly. The colour of the sky with that slight purplish colour fades in with the background, adding a nice eerie touch.

Blurb-

Your example...

"One day her simple life is changed completely..."

I don't know if it's just me, but this sentence sounded a little off. I think it's because you are writing in the present tense, but the 'changed' beside the 'is' makes it sound off. As I said, it might be me, but a suggestion would be this...


My suggestion...

"One day her simple life changes completely..."


I'm not sure if that sounds better, but that would be something I would probably write myself.

Other than that, your blurb is quite interesting and would make me want to have a quick read.


Grammar-

(Chapter One)

Your example...

"Our faces resembling one another but hers sharper and tidier."


I would consider changing the structure of this sentence as it sounds awkward.

'hers' is used as a personal pronoun (her's) which indicates when something belongs to her. For this sentence to make sense, I would be more specific with the details. What feature is sharper?

I would also remove tidier because I think there can be other words that express the same meaning, but sound better.


My suggestion would be...

"Mom has a larger nose and a strong jawline, but apart from that, our faces resemble one another."

NOTE- You don't have to use my example. I'm merely showing that being specific about facial features is better. It paints a better picture of the appearance of the characters. I noticed you talk about the difference with the colour hair, but don't forget the readers have nothing to go on about what each character looks like besides the colour hair. 

✿ 

Your example...

"I catch my moms eye..."


My suggestion would be...

"I catch my mom's eye..."


I added an apostrophe because the eyes belong to the mom, just be careful with the possessive pronouns because in most cases, there needs to be an apostrophe to show something belongs to her mom.

(Mom's eyes. Mom's purse. Mom's toothbrush)

Additional note- try to play with different words. Using 'eye' is okay, but there are better words to use, such as 'gaze.'

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