Chloe's Book Reviews {CLOSED/ HIATUS}

Mellifluous

                                                                      (BookWorms Community Reviews)

Author: @Wingsanddreams

Chapters: 2 chapters so far

Genre: Romance

Specific: Anything

Cover-

The cover is quite nice to look at but doesn't really grab my attention. It's hard to know the genre just by looking at the cover as it could be teen fiction or maybe even chick-lit.

Blurb-

The essence of your blurb is good. You just need some help switching some of the words to make them fit in with the content.

Your example.

"Riva is an average looking twenty two years old girl, who walks with a crutch, that crutch is not just a metal piece but something that has defined her childhood."

There should be a hyphen between "twenty two years old."

It should look like this "twenty-two-year-old."

I also felt that you could put a full stop after "crutch."

Here is my suggestion.

"Riva is an average looking twenty-two-year-old girl, who walks with a crutch."

Then you could start the next sentence with a capital.

Here is my example.

"The crutch is not just a piece of metal but something that has defined her throughout her childhood."

Your example.

"Nevertheless, it doesn't hold her back from been a lively, cheerful person. But is she really happy?"

You just need to swap "been" for "being."

Here is my example.

"Nevertheless, it doesn't hold her back from being a lively, cheerful person. But is she really happy?"

Your example.

"She is happily faking a life until she steps into someone who has the courage to show her the reality."

I would consider changing "steps" as this word doesn't fit the context given.

Here is my suggestion.

"She is happily faking a life until she bumps into someone who has the courage to show her reality."

Another example could be...

"She is faking her happiness until she bumps into someone who dares Riva to face reality."

Your example.

"Life: Luxury, Laughter, love and behind all this delusion is a numb, withered soul because When did money buy happiness?"

This sounds a little confusing. You can make it sound simpler by changing the words around.

Here is a suggestion.

"Behind the delusion of love and laughter, is a numb girl whose life is far from luxurious. Money doesn't buy happiness?"

"...behind all this delusion is a numb, withered soul..." sounds a little depressing. You also don't want to give too much away in the blurb. You can describe her emotions and her withered soul within the chapters. (This is great for character development. Show vs Tell)