Chloe's Book Reviews {CLOSED/ HIATUS}

A Storm on the Mountain

Username: amaranthinepoetry 

Genre: General/Literary Fiction 

Chapters: 3 chapters 

Specific: Writing style and quality 

Book 

Cover - 

The cover fits the title and the format is set out in a nice, pleasant way. 

Blurb - 

The blurb is perfect! 

Grammar - 

Chapter One: 

This is rather a mild point, but I think by cutting out the filter words, your writing would be more precise and meaningful. Words like "just," "then," and "only" etc. 

Your examples...

"Aanav then produced a thin cigarette..." 

"He only let out a set of hisses..." 

"Aanav then pushed the bowl lightly..." 

"Aanav closed his eyes, just for a brief moment..." 

These filter words act as a barrier that separates the reader and the meaning behind the action. That's how I describe them anyway. They don't really bring anything to the sentence but increase the word count. 

Suggestions could be... 

"Aanav produced a thin cigarette..." 

"He let out a set of hisses..." 

"Aanav pushed the bowl..."

"Aanav closed his eyes for a brief moment..." 

Hopefully, you can start to see a difference. 

Punctuation - 

You have an issue with "it's" and "its." 

(Chapter One) 

Examples...

"...looking at it's luscious red cover,"

"...as if bleeding from it's edges."

It's = It is 

Its = belongs to a person/object (possessive) 

Suggestions here would be...

"...looking at its luscious red cover," 

"...as if bleeding from its edges."

(Chapter Two) 

Examples...

"...the circumference prodding out of it's conical appearance."

"On it's tiles," 

"...a puff of gust with mud flew towards it's partner." 

Suggestions here would be...

"...the circumference prodding out of its conical appearance." 

"On its tiles,"

"...a puff of gust with mud flew towards its partner."