Problem Kid

Chapter 22

"Goodnight babe," Jimmy whispers to me as we lay in bed cuddled together after a good day out. First, we did some shopping and went to the park for a picnic which was amazing. Next, we found a local fair we explored and played in before going out to a nice restaurant for a steak as our dinner. I snuck most of my food away, unable to stomach food at this time. Finally, at 9.40pm, we had gone to bed as Jimmy was tired. I lay with him for a while, begging my mind to let me sleep however nothing works and instead I lay wide awake. After 20 minutes, i took my meds before
heading into the front room and sit on the sofa. Summer brings me the remote and I pat her thankfully as I turn it on and put an old movie I don't know on quietly. I'm hot in my long sleeved pyjamas so I roll up the sleeves since I'm alone, Summer laying her head on my hands when I anxiously pick at a bandage.
"Hey," I look up to see Sam in the doorway wearing a pair of blue sonic pyjama trousers and no top. He takes one from the door frame and slides it on before sitting beside me.
"You know I saw earlier and I'm not going to have a go at you. Don't worry. I want to be here for you. I know it's gonna be a real rough patch but I know you can make it through," he whispers, arm around me protectively.
"How far up does it go?" He asks and I lift the last bit of my sleeve to reveal my shoulder. He nods. I then show my stomach and legs and he nods sadly. I look at his scars covering his arms for a second before collapsing into tears on his chest. I cry how sorry I am and how I hate myself and wish I could just die in many sentences, some incoherent as, the whole time, he pats my back, his soothing whispers telling me he knows and it's ok to feel like that. As I calm down, he slowly begins to speak, his whisper calming me.
"It's ok. You're going to feel lost and broken, like nothing is going to help you and you'll never be ok again. But you will. You can make it. Your mother would have wanted the best for you. She's still here for you, just looking down. She will always be here," he continues to speak however I don't recognise most of the words as I allow my eyes to close and my body to relax against his. However, I'm suddenly woken up.
"Everleigh!!" I jump up.
"Everleigh, She's alive! She's alive!" My eyes widen and suddenly, I'm no longer tired.
"Sam? No way! No! Really?!" Tears roll down my cheeks as I sob in disbelief. Jimmy comes running into the room.
"It's true! She's next door!" I leap up and rush into the bedroom with tears in my eyes, freezing when I see my mother sitting on the bed.
"Everleigh," I hear her soft voice.
"But mum... the car accident..." she shakes her head with a gentle smile.
"It didn't kill me. I'm here. I'm ok," I hear a whisper creeping up from behind me and then around, unable to make out the words being said however my mum comes over and turns my face towards her again.
I stare into her emerald eyes with a small sigh of relief.
"Mummy..." I sob.
"It's ok. Mummy's here," suddenly, the door opens and in bursts Maya and Jack who look shocked. Almost instantly, Maya sprints over to my mother and hugs her tightly however before she can talk again, I'm jolted awake.
"Ev!" I turn to who woke me and see Jimmy standing beside my face. I'm angered at his interruption.
"GO AWAY!" I yell and he frowns sadly.
"Ev?"
"YOU TOOK MUM AWAY! SHE WAS ALIVE! I WAS TALKING TO HER!" I sit up and feel a blanket fall off of me.
"Oh no..." I see jimmy looking at the bandages and growl.
"GO AWAY!" I scream before running into my bedroom and slamming the door. Alone.
"Everleigh... please open up," Jimmy speaks, his face pushed up against the wooden door.
"Go away...." my voice cracks as I hold back tears.
"Don't do anything... bad," I hiss.
"Just because I relapsed once doesn't mean I'm going to start attempting to die every time something bad happens! Just GO AWAY!" I scream before jimmy sighs, mutters an apology and turns away from the door. I hear his footsteps trail off into the distance and almost cry, guilt consuming me. With a small groan, I walk over to my suitcase and open it up, searching for clothes. I stop on the funeral outfit I have picked out before realising... it's today... that's why I had the dream...
I know it's soon for a funeral and of course, we should have left more time however I was desperate to hurry up and get my mama buried, worried if we waited too long then maybe her body might get damaged or disappear or something. After a small tear has slid down my cheek, I prepare for the closed casket ceremony.
One of the things my mother put on her will was her rules for the funeral.
1- everyone must wear the brightest clothes they can find.
2- bright flowers and balloons must be everywhere.
3- there has to be a mad party and celebration of her life, not just sad cake cutting
And the final rule.
4- if Everleigh is there, she must smile at least once. Make sure my baby girl is happy. And if you're reading this, I love you, Ev.