Chapter 43

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I look at the time on my phone. It's 7.25pm. I've only just finished crying after about half an hour of sobbing into my knees. Nobody has been to check on me. Nobody even noticed me breaking down but that's fine. I don't care anymore. I sit back wiping my eyes one last time so I'm certain they are dry. Just as I finish, a nurse walks into my room. He's a tall, dark skinned male. He waves slightly.

"Hello there, Everleigh. I'm Mike and I'm here with your snack," He tells me, smiling down at me as he places the tray on my table. I'm sick of happy faced nurses. Fuck happy.

"Thanks," I say quietly and he nods before leaving. I look at the slice of toast and the paper cup of steaming hot chocolate. The smell makes me feel sick. I rip up the toast and the crumbs litter the plate. I put each piece into my pocket as I rip it apart. After a couple of minutes, the whole slice of toast is sat in my hoodie pocket. I look down at the hot chocolate. 190 calories. Fuck. Once I've turned off the heart rate monitor and pulled the sticker off off finger, I pick up the cup and stand from my bed. My legs wobble slightly beneath me however I force myself to stay standing. The coast is clear so I quickly go into the bathroom and empty the cup down the sink, running the water for 2 seconds to wash it all away. There, gone without a trace. I hurry back to bed and sit down, crossing my legs. Not even 30 seconds later, the nurse returns and I pretend to drink out of the empty cup.

"Do you need any more water?" He asks and I nod.

"Yes please. Thanks!" I say and he takes my jug away with him. I sigh in relief, putting down the empty cup. Summer is walking towards the door, staring out of it. I sigh and stand up, walking towards her to see what she is looking at. Another lady across the hall is making cooing noises in an attempt to call her over. I walk towards her and Summer follows me happily.

"Hey! Can I please stroke her?!" The woman is young, probably in her mid twenties.

"Yeah, that's okay. Next time though can you please come ask me because she's a working dog so she shouldn't be distracted," I point at her 'service dog collar, trying not to get annoyed. I hate it when people try to distract her.

"Oh, I'm so sorry! I didn't know," I tell her it's okay as she plays with my dog, crouching down to reach her. She has an IV in her arm and is wearing a hospital gown with a beanie on her head. She looks so tiny and frail, her cheekbones caving in. I feel bad for her.

"What are you in for?" She asks me, smiling slightly. Her smile is so sweet, her piercing blue eyes standing out.

"Mental health. You?" I say.

"Blood Cancer. Stage 3. I normally just come to the chemo ward weekly but I ended up having a bad turn at home so they called an ambulance and now I'm in here until I'm stable," I apologise and she laughs.

"It's fine, don't worry! Everyone always says they are sorry but it's no one's fault! Just a shitty world, eh? I've got a 70% chance of surviving anyway, it's fine!" I smile slightly and nod.

"What's your name?" I ask. Summer is loving all the attention.

"I'm Ryla! What's your name?"

"I'm Everleigh. Summer loves you!" I laugh at my dog as she licks Ryla's face.

"I'm gonna go back to my room and sort my stuff out. I'll leave Summer here with you, just ask a nurse to bring her back over when you're tired of her," I wave goodbye and head back to my bedroom. My head spins as I walk through the door. I stop and lean on the frame, rubbing my forehead for a second. I sigh and walk over to my bag. I sort through my stuff and decide what I need for the night. My phone charger, headphones and a set of pyjamas stay out along with my toothbrush and toothpaste. I place those things on the end of my bed, folding the pyjamas last. Some long black pyjama bottoms with stars on them and a plain black t-shirt. I sort through everything else, organising it all neatly in the bag. I put my sketchpad, pencils and the assortment of other random things in my room all inside the bag. I move over to Summer's things. I take out a small rope toy, a tennis ball and a chewy toy and throw them onto her dog bed. Her water bowl is still half full so I leave that but I put down some dry food for when she comes back. A take a few treats from the bag and put them onto my table. Everything else stays in the bag. I walk into the bathroom with my toothpaste and brush in my hand, my head still spinning. I put them down by the sink and as I try to move away, my hand stays hovering above the counter top. My body is still for a moment and I feel my eyelids begin to twitch. I try to turn around however my body is paralyzed. Not even a second later, I feel a hard impact on my left arm as I fall to the ground. The last thing I see is the lino of the hospital bathroom floor before I'm out.

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