Chapter 64

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Katrina: So you still miss her huh?

Me: Everyday.

I've been going to therapy for the past 2 years. Losing Lulu took a toll on me but finding out that Armani isn't my daughter sent me over the edge. I neglected my son for 2 years for a child that wasn't even mine.

Katrina: She must be really important to you because she seems to be the main topic every time you come here. And it's been 2 years Ricky.

Me: I know. I just. I just wish I could've treated her differently.

Katrina: Start by doing your part. Be a father to your son.

Me: It's not that easy.

Katrina: Explain.

Me: Every time I wanna spend time with him her bum ass nigga gets in the way. I don't wanna fight around my son.

I haven't been the same ever since I found out my daughter wasn't even mine. I left all that gang shit behind me too.

Katrina: I think your weak.

Excuse me what?

Me: What?

Katrina: You heard me right. I think you don't wanna fight for your son because you lost your strength when you found out Armani wasn't your daughter. You lost hope.

Me: I'm not sure if I follow.

Katrina: You told me that when you were with Lulu, you protected her and you would've done anything for her. You made sure she was safe after that stabbing incident.

I nodded my head and waited for her to continue.

Katrina: Now that she's out of the picture, you don't have it in you anymore. You don't have that drive and determination anymore.

Me: I guess so.

Katrina: I know so. Look Ricky, you had a lot of issues the moment you came in here and it took us 2 years to solve them but the only issue that's left is your Lulu case. Imma give you two options Ricky.

By now I was on the edge of my seat.

Katrina: It's either you get her back or you'll just have to move on, move forward and focus on yourself.

Damn man.

Katrina: Your a good man. I know you'll do good Ricky.

I nodded my head.

Katrina: Our time is up. I hope I don't see you for the next appointment.

Me: Thanks Doc (chuckling).

I got up and left the room. Damn how the fuck am I gonna get her back? Imma think about it. Oh I forgot to tell y'all, I stopped drinking but I ain't gon stop my weed.

I then decided to go to Lulu's place. I got there and I knocked on the door. Then someone opened the door. It was a kid.

Him: Who the hell are you?

Well hello to you too little fucker.

Me: Is Lulu here?

Him: What's it to you?

Okay see if I knock someone's child out imma get arrested.

Me: Is she here or not lil man?

Him: Lil man? Man.....

Lulu: Armando shut the fuck up and go play your games.

What goofy ass name is that?

Armando: But he....

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