Severus Snape Oneshots

Daily Prophet? More like Daily Gossip.

"Professssorrrr!!!" You whine, dramatically stomping into his classroom office without knocking.

"Hmm, I wonder who that could be?.." The man sarcastically mutters to himself without looking up from the paper in his hand.

He was used to being your usual go-to therapist, despite only being your Head of House. He has learned to accept the fact that he would never again have a peaceful (and quiet) Saturday Morning.

"Draco is so annoying!!!" You exhale, flopping down into the comfy seat across from him.

"I'm aware. Believe me, I would know that better than anyone." He nonchalantly states, keeping his eyes on the Daily Prophet in his hands.

"Yeah I know.. He kept throwing paper balls at the back of my head. He didn't stop until Blaize pantsed him in front of everyone. You know what Draco sai-"

" 'Wait until my father hears about this'." The man finishes your sentence, sighing with a pause.

"I'll have you know, Lucius couldn't give a damn about his son's complaints... I'll be honest with you- I'm glad that boy is my godson and not my son." He says with a smirk.

"I'd definitely think the same thing if I were in your place, Professor." You sigh.

You continue to casually ramble on as the man continues to read his paper, occasionally sipping his cup of coffee- likely not listening whatsoever.

"...but everything was fine and all... Oh yeah- also, Pansy Parkinson is pregnant." You nonchalantly shrug, picking at your cuticles.

The man suddenly chokes on his hot coffee, before bending the paper in half to meet your gaze.

"What?" He lowly asks, his eyes slightly  hardening as they look into yours.

~

"So I was like, girl, you have got to tell the baby daddy!" You continue on, waving your hands in the air as you speak.

"Do you think he knows?" Professor Snape asks, leaning forwards in his seat with subtle interest.

You scoff and roll your eyes.

"So far I've covered her secret- but as far as he knows, she's just had a stomach bug the past two weeks."

"My Godson is so daft. Let's pray that this baby will not receive his intelligence. Lucius is going to kill him." The man exhales through his nose, taking a sip of his coffee.

You smirk and rest your elbow on the armrest. He then notices your reaction and tilts his head, narrowing his dark eyes.

"What?" He lowly asks.

"That's the thing.... This baby? It isn't Draco's." You quietly say, leaning back into your chair with a smug, yet cheeky expression..

The man's lips slightly part as he raises an eyebrow, readjusting in his seat. He lets out a soft exhale of air, looking at the ground.

"It's his best friend's. Blaize Zabini." You awkwardly state, yet secretly simmering with thrill at the betrayal between Blaize and his asshole best friend.

"I would say that's worse.. But something tells me that Draco had it coming, really." Snape shrugs with a sigh.