kickin' it | femina bellator

44 | oh, christmas nuts!

"Don't do it. Seriously, you are gonna break your hand," Milton told Jack who prepared himself.

"I can do this," Jack said confidently before punching a fruit cake like he would any board but unlike the boards the cake didn't break and Jack winced loudly, "Dude, your nana makes one tough fruitcake. How does your family eat that?"

"We don't," Milton said, straining to lift up the heavy cake, "My dad wedged last year's behind the wheel of our camper so it wouldn't roll down the driveway."

Milton threw the cake into the garbage when Kim, Azalea and Eddie entered the dojo, "Are you two sure we shouldn't ask Rudy to help us decorate the dojo window for Christmas?"

"Why would we, it's just more work for me," Azalea said honestly, "I'm going to re-do everything you two do anyways. That's why I am in charge of all the Christmas decorating in our family, he doesn't have the eye for it."

"Look what I did!" Rudy said puddly, holding up a toilet seat with a red ribbon, "I made this beautiful festive wreath out of our toilet seat."

"And that's the reason why you get to decorate the back of the Christmas tree and why I re-decorate it when you are done," Azalea told him.

The door opened and Joan pulled Jerry inside, "Come on," Joan told a groaning Jerry, "Get in here. Tell them what you did, you."

"I accidentally used my dad's pressure washer to get rid of the line of people in front of the electronics store," Jerry explained.

"He blew some need right out of his loafers," Joan said seriously and Azalea couldn't help but let out a laugh at the image and so did Joan, "Nerds," she chuckled.

"So, did you get the road demon or not?" Milton wondered with an excited grin.

"No, they didn't have any left," Jerry said in disappointment.

"What exactly is a 'road demon'?" Rudy asked,

"Only the hottest Christmas present this year," Jack explained, "It's a high tech, remote controlled, futuristic combat tank. I'm telling you, I want one so bad Christmas isn't gonna be Christmas if I don't get a Road Demon."

"Dude, if I wake up and there's not one under my tree — I'm gonna be on," Jerry told them seriously.

"You guys have totally misunderstood the meaning of Christmas," Azalea told them, "What truly matters is that you get to eat a lot of cookies and candy."

The guys ignored her and started to chat about how much they wanted a Road Demon which didn't sit right with Rudy, "Guys! Guys, Christmas isn't about getting a remote-controlled Road Demon."

"Told ya," Azalea said smugly.

"It's not about cookies either," Rudy deadpanned.

"He's right," Milton agreed, "It's also about getting a pony!" Yee-haw."

"No, guys, guys! Guys!" Rudy got their attention again, "Christmas isn't about getting things. All right, it's about being filled with the spirit."

"Yeah, that's right Rudy!" Kim said, "I mean, me, Eddie and Lea it here early to decorate the dojo window because we got the spirit."

"I got the holly-jollies and I got 'em bad," Eddie stated smugly.

"I just got control issues;" Azalea admitted, "But I have to say that this truly is the most wonderful time of the year."

"All right, the three of you are coming with me," Rudy told the three boys, "I'm gonna teach you a lesson about the true spirit of Christmas."

"Have fun," Azalea said smugly, waving goodbye to the boys as they reluctantly followed Rudy out of the dojo.