I lived with the boys almost 10 years. I was 14 when my dad died on a hunt and John took care of me. Well, not exactly John because he died 4 months after. Bobby was like a father to me and his death cost me a lot. But of course the boys where there for me. They always are. Dean was already 27 and Sam 22 when we met.
Flashback
It's been a few days since John's death and all the three of us are staying at Bobby's. I go downstairs and I see Dean sitting on the couch with a half empty bottle of scotch in his hand. I walk to him slowly and I sit next to him. "Hey" I say "Hey" he says without looking at me. "It gets better" I say "What?" he asks and finally looks at me "The pain, it gets better" I say and he nods and takes a sip of his drink.
"Thanks" he says and places his hand on my thigh. I immediately look at his hand and then back at him. He takes it back "Sorry" he says "It's fine" I say and I run upstairs.
End of flashback
That was the only time that Dean did something like that. And I was only 14. But now I wish he did it again. He is really hot but I haven't thought of him that way back then. The only guy that made me kinda forget Dean was Alex.
I met Alex a last week when I went for groceries and we went out for a coffee. He gave me his number and then he asked me out. And I am really looking forward to it. But there is something that I'm nervous of. I have never been with someone. I've never kissed someone or had sex with someone. I was always thinking of Dean but it's different with Alex, somehow he makes me forget about him. and I don't want to disappoint him. And I know just the right guy to teach me.
"Dean!" I yell as I walk to the library of the bunker "What?" he asks as he sees me "Where is Sam?" I ask "Went to watch a french movie or something" he says "Great" I say and I smile. "I need your help" I say and I lean against the other table. "What do you need?" he asks and closes his laptop.
"I have a date tonight" I say "Ok..." "I've never been on a date before" "You're joking, right?" "No, I am with you and Sam all the time if you haven't noticed" "Yeah, you're right. So, how can I help you?" "I need advice on everything. Even on kissing" I say and he nods.
"First thing, you are going to be yourself" he says and gets up from his chair. "If he likes you, he needs to like the real you" he continues. "If you see him getting closer..." he says as he walks slowly to me "... don't panic. He is probably just trying to make a move. If you don't want, you can stop him, ok?" he asks softly and I nod.
"Then he'll raise his hand..." he says as his hand moves up my arm "... and he'll place it on your cheek" he says and cups my cheek. His thumb rubs my cheek. "And then he'll look you in the eyes" he says and does so. I look at him in the eye and I bite my lip. His eyes go down to my lips and then back at me. "He'll start coming closer... and closer" he says as he leans closer to me and I can feel his hot breath against my lips. "And closer until..." and with that I felt his lips on mine. It was just a slow peck at first.
He pulls away "And then it'll maybe became more heated" he whispers against my lips. He kisses me again but different. It was definitely more heated. He lets go of the kiss and looks at me. We are both taking deep breaths. I open my eyes and I look at him. Our foreheads are still attached.
I lean and I kiss him. He kisses me back immediately. I place my hands on the back of his neck pulling him as close to me as possible. He positions himself between my legs and I wrap them around his waist. His hands travel up my thighs to my waist. His lips leave mine and move to my neck. While he is sucking there, I can feel his hard member between my legs. My folds get soaked and a moan escape my lips. I feel his smile against my skin.
His fingers play with the rim of my t-shirt. But a noise that sounded like a car interrupted us. Sam is probably back. Dean pulls away and looks at me. "Sorry... I..." he says "It's--" I start saying but he leaves the library. Then Sam enters "Everything ok?" he asks "Yeah" I say and I go to my room.
I get ready for my date but I can't get Dean out of my head. I try to ignore it. Hopefully, it'll be over when I meet with Alex. Hopefully.
I wore a (Y/F/C) A-line dress with a pair of black high heels and a little makeup on. I walk out of my room and I met Dean in the hallway. "Oh hi" he says "Hi" I say and I smile "You look really good" he says "Thanks" I say and I smile. There was an awkward silence for a few seconds. "By the way, thanks for... earlier" I say "Your welcome. Have fun tonight" he says and starts walking away from me. "Thanks. And if he doesn't want to continue, I'm not going to pressure him just because I want more. Just so you know" I say "Good" he says and walks to his room.
The date was great and Alex is a great guy. But seems like it wasn't enough to get my mind off of Dean. It's like I'm infected with Dean Winchester and there is no cure. Even when Alex made his move and kissed me at the end of the date I was thinking about Dean. He even looks kinda like him. Dirty blonde hair, green eyes, freckles. But he is not Dean.
I can't get any sleep so I get up and I go to the kitchen. I take a beer and I walk to the library. I find Dean sitting there. I turn around to leave "Stay, it's fine" he says and I stop. I turn and I sit across from him. I open my laptop and I take a sip from my beer. "Was your date this bad?" he asks "No. It was really good actually but he is..." "Not the one you are looking for?" he completes my sentence "Exactly" I say and he nods.
"I thought that it wasn't a good idea to date someone that knows nothing about my... job" I say and he nods "I need someone that can handle this life. Someone that can handle me. Someone who knows how to treat a girl and make her need him so bad that she is screaming for him" I say and I look at him. He changes his position in the chair and looks at me.
"I'm sure that you can find someone good enough" he says "What if I already found him?" "Really? Is he... around your age?" he asks and I chuckle "Oh please. Guys my age don't know how to touch me. They don't know how to tease me or make me scream their name" "And then who does?" "I have someone in mind. Someone that makes me wet every time he walks in the room. But the sad thing is that he is wearing many layers of clothing. The good part is that I can still see his hands that I want so badly on me" I say and he gets up.
He walks to me and lifts me from the chair. He pins me to the bookshelves and crashes his lips on mines. I wrap my legs around his waist and my hands around his neck. His hands that were on my back are making their way to my butt. I don't want this to end. But the fact that we were out of breath causes us to pull away. He lets me down and takes a step back. "We shouldn't..." he says "Dean--" "No, stop. We need to stop" he says and leaves the room.
When the sun rised, I went to the kitchen. Sam was there. "Morning" I say and I sit "Good morning. Everything ok?" he asks "No" "What did he do?" "Nothing, the date was great" "I'm not talking about that. I'm talking about Dean" "What about Dean?" "Oh come on, I've seen you when he walks in the room. Now tell me" "I tried to make a move and it seemed like he wanted it too. We maybe make out but then he left" "You should really talk, without making out. I'm gonna leave for a couple of hours, ok? Just try not to kill each other in the end" "Ok, thanks" I say and he smiles.
I walk to his door and I knock. But there is no answer. I knock again. "Dean please let me in" I say "Just to talk" I continue. He opens the door and lets me in. "Our last talk was kinda... weird so I needed to really talk to you right now" I say and he nods. "I'll get to the point, I like you and I want you" I say "(Y/N), I'm not good for you" "I don't care--" "But I do. I'm bringing nothing more than pain to people and I don't want this for you. Besides, I'm 13 years older than you and--" "I don't care. I really don't care Dean because I'm really into you"
"Maybe, but you should stop" "No, I don't want to stop. I don't want to stop seeing you, talking to you, touching you, kissing you. I want you and only you. You drive me crazy and I love every second of it Dean. Please do me a favour and let those feelings of protecting me etc to the side and tell me that you want to stop this" I say and he looks at me.
"I love you" he says "I loved you since... forever. But I was able to hold it back because I scared you back then at Bobby's when I tried to make a move" he says and sits on the bed. "You have no idea how much I regretted it" I say and I sit next to him. He chuckles "You do?" he asks "Yeah" I say and he nods.
I look at him and he looks at me. He cups my cheek and rubs it softly. He leans closer and kisses me softly. He pulls away "I love you too" I whisper and he smiles. He kisses me again and I can feel that he is smiling. I can't resist and I smile too.
He pulls away "Are you free tonight?" he asks "Yes, why are you asking?" "Date. You and me and pie. We can stay here or go out" "Here is just fine" I say and I smile "Great" he says and smiles. "I'm gonna go get ready" I say "I don't think you can look better" "Let me surprise you then" I say and I peck his lips.