Raf walks back to the theatre changing rooms and changes back.
She gets back to work "how are you feeling?" Morven asks as she walks by.
"Will everyone stop asking me that I'm fine!" Cara huffs.
"Geez sorry I asked... what's wrong with you recently" Morven says.
"I'm probably just grouchy, I'm sorry I snapped" she sighs.
Morven nods and carries on working. Cara sees Raf come back onto the ward and she totally blanks him and avoids him at all costs.
He heads to the nurses station and grabs some notes and Cara heads off in the opposite direction.
Raf walks after her but Serena stops him to talk to him about Cara.
She pulls him aside "everything alright?" Raf asks her to see what she wants him for.
"Is Cara well enough to be working today?" She asks.
"Yeah sure she is, why don't you think she should be here?" He asks.
"She's unwell" Serena says.
He looks at her and nods and looks over at Cara. "She should stay off work, I would suggest for 48 hours at least" Serena says.
"Well you try and get that through to Cara, because I can't" he replies.
"If you wish" Serena says and walks over to Cara. "Nurse Martinez I'm going to have to send you home, you shouldn't be here" Serena says to her.
"I'm fine" Cara says.
"No Cara I really suggest you do, go and get some rest" Serena smiles slightly.
Cara finally agrees to it and goes and gets her bags and heads home but stops off at the pharmacy first.
She thinks to herself and heads to the counter. She buys a pregnancy test pack as she just can't get the idea out of her head.
She knew there was something different about herself, she felt the way she did when she was pregnant with Katy.
She always used to get a little flutter in her stomach but was it her imagination or not.
She walks home as it's not far and wants come fresh air. She gets inside and has a quick shower.
Once out the shower she dries herself off and puts some comfy pyjamas on.
Cara texts Raf to see if he would like any dinner left for him as she makes some for herself but she doesn't get a reply as he's going to be at work for another couple of hours.
She decides to leave the test for a bit as she wants to relax first.
She tries to eat some dinner but ends up leaving half of it.
She starts to heave a little as she looks at the baked beans on her plate and instantly scrapes them into the kitchen bin.
She sighs as she washes up. Not long after she receives a text from Raf. 'Caz darling. Fletch and some of the guys from work have invited me out for a few drinks tonight, make sure you get some rest and I'll see you later?' He texts.
Cara initially ignored it and she receives a second text 'look, I know you might not want to speak to me right now and I get that but please let me know that your alright, I love you x' he says.
She just puts the phone back down as Raf has really upset with her.
She lays on the couch for a while just resting her eyes but not for long and gets up and grabs her bag. It's driving her mad not knowing.
She smiles as she gets upstairs and reads the box.
She opens the box and there's two in the pack. She reads it carefully as she wants to be sure.
Cara pulls her pyjama bottoms down and then sits on the toilet with the pregnancy test between her legs. She tries to think of water to make herself pee.
"Come on, it can't be that hard" she tells herself.
She finally manages to pee, she finishes up and places the pregnancy test on the sink and sorts herself out.
She puts the toilet seat down and sits herself on it and rests her chin on her hands. She waits two to three minutes like it says to on the box.
This time seems to go ever so slowly. She can't wait to prove Raf wrong and see his face.
She braces herself and stands. She's not sure if she can bring herself to look.
"You can do this Cara"
She mumbles to herself and counts to three and looks down at the test.
Her heart sink as she stares at the test. It only shows one blue line and her heart breaks. "No" she says getting tearful. She grabs the other one from the box and opens it up as she's in denial.
She takes the other test and waits three minutes again.
She immediately picks it up and looks at it as it comes up with the same result.
She tries to breath but finds her breathing shaky. She starts to cry and puts the tests in the bin.
She goes into her bedroom and sits on her bed and starts crying to herself with her knees up to her chest.
Cara is completely heart broken and she can't believe it was negative.
She wanted to believe she could become pregnant naturally and have the family she craved for but it just didn't seem like it was going to turn out for her.
She is so heart broken that she will never hold her baby and think how natural they were convinced. She is crying that much she doesn't hear the front door open and click short.
She doesn't even realise that Raf has just come home and comes up looking for her. He walks into the room to see Cara in tears.
"Oh Cara" Raf says as he hurries over to her.
"You were right" she cries and looks over in the direction of the bathroom.
Raf gets up and walks into the bathroom and grabs some tissue for Cara and then looks in the bin.
He pulls out the two pregnancy tests and sighs. "Oh Cara" he mumbles.
He goes back into Cara and hugs her. She holds onto him tightly and cries into his chest. "I know your hurting but you can't do this to yourself" he says as he hugs her.
"I... just... thought I-I was" she cries.
"I know I know I want this as much as you do" he says and kisses her head.
"Everything is the... same as last t-time" she mumbles into Raf's chests and continues to cry.
He pulls her off him, holds her face and rests his forehead against hers. "Listen to me... I love you and it will happen ok" he tells her.
"I wanted this so bad" she cries as she looks at him.
"So do I and it will happen" Raf says.
"What if I can't" she mumbles.
"No such word as can't?" He smiles and kisses her nose lightly.
"I mean what if I'm unable to" she says looking at him worryingly.
"You will now less of that, you're tired you need sleep" he smiles.
He wipes her eyes with his thumbs and smiles at her. She smiles slightly. "Your probably right, oh look at me" she says looking down at herself.
He hugs her and he lifts her up off the bed and opens the sheets up and makes her get under the bed.
He starts to tuck her in and she begins to giggle.
"There's that smile" he smiles.
She continues to smile at him "I love to see you this smiley" he smirks and kisses her head.
"Are you coming in?" She smiles.
"Off to the toilet" he replies and quickly gets up and goes to the ensuite.
He goes to the loo and tidies the ensuite before going back into the bedroom.
He strips down to his boxers and then climbs into bed.
"Come here you" he says and opens his arm out and she cuddles up to him and smiles.
He kisses her cheek and lies back and relaxes.
"I love you" she says as she closes her eyes.
He smiles and watches as she falls to sleep.