forty one

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I am told off by my teacher, for using the b word at the end of my argument, and while some people clap and cheer me on, some people just bow their heads, knowing everything I said was true.

I did feel really bad after wards considering a large portion of my friends were of other races, not black, but I just felt the need to express myself.

Lane offers to drive me and I agree, even though I feel like we don't connect, or are alike in any way, I still want things to work out between us.

"Are you okay? You seemed pretty heated in class today, what's going on?" Lane looks over at me with a concerned look on his face.

"Weren't you?" I snap my head at him, with a loud tone in my voice, and by the way he looks at me I instantly feel bad.

"I mean, I don't really like getting into the whole I'm black, you're white and you're brown thing, I just see everyone as the same." He shrugs, speaking quietly.

A part of me agreed with him, but it annoyed me how uninterested people were in racism towards black people, but when we do something like the BET they'd whine about it all day long.

"Hm," I just shrug and place my chin on my hands, looking out the window.

Lane drops me off in front of my house, before telling me to come to Gabi and Danielle's party on Friday.

I make a mental note that today is Wednesday, and I'm considering going since all my friends have asked for me to.

All my friends being two people.

When I got home, my mum had left a note on the counter saying:

I told Aisha to come do your hair tomorrow after school, I'm asleep, no one should disturb me.


Jade and Sari are in their room, watching tv, and I head to the bathroom and take a shower. Regular shower thoughts flow through my mind as I try to forget about today.

I wonder if Harry Styles is in the shower as well, I think to myself.

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